Loneliness
by Raven25
Summary: Daniel may have made a friend for life. The only problem is, his worst nightmare is coming true...
1. Loneliness - how it began

"Where the hell are they?" Jack O'Neill demanded. Five minutes into the debriefing, but so far, he, Daniel, and the general were the only ones here. Sam Carter and Teal'C appeared to have gone AWOL.  
  
"Why are you asking me, Jack?" asked Daniel wearily. "How am I supposed to know?"  
  
A little surprised, Jack stole a look at Daniel out of the corner of his eye. To his experienced eyes, the archaeologist looked absolutely exhausted. Strange. They'd only been offworld for a grand total of about half an hour before picking themselves up and getting home. Jack himself felt a little tired, yeah, but Daniel looked ready to drop where he stood. Bearing this in mind, Jack turned to the general. "With all due respect, sir, could we start the debriefing without Carter and Teal'C? It's not as if they could tell you anything we couldn't."  
  
"You have no idea where they are?" General Hammond asked. "Could they possibly be with Dr. Frasier?"  
  
"No," Daniel shook his head. "Janet said she'd leave all the medical stuff until after the debriefing."  
  
"Yeah, the doc's always nice like that," muttered Jack.  
  
"What was that, Colonel O'Neill?"  
  
"Nothing, sir."  
  
"All right," said the general, coming to a decision. "Let's get started. What happened out there?"  
  
"Basically, we walked out of the Gate straight into a war," said Jack. "Some Goa'uld versus some other Goa'uld, and lots of Jaffa, I don't know what it was about. There were no other aliens. Well, everyone was so busy fighting they never even noticed the Gate activated. So, we appeared, we nearly got killed by stray energy blasts, so I decided it would be best if we just moved on out of there. And that was that, sir."  
  
The general wasn't letting it go that easily. "You were gone for thirty minutes, Colonel, and yet you say you arrived, turned round and came back again. Are you sure nothing else happened?"  
  
"Unless you count Daniel wandering off again, no, sir," said Jack smoothly.  
  
"Dr. Jackson wandered off?" asked the general.  
  
"Yes," said Jack. "I sent Carter and Teal'C through the Stargate and went to find him. But he came back by himself, so we came through a couple of minutes after Carter and Teal'C."  
  
General Hammond was a little surprised. They were talking about Daniel as if he wasn't there in the room with them, and yet he hadn't said a word. In fact, his head was on the table, and all they could see of him was his long, brown blonde hair covering his head. General Hammond wondered vaguely what would happen if Daniel were military, rather than the eccentric civilian he was, and shuddered at the thought. Independently, he reached the conclusion that the young archaeologist was shattered.  
  
Suddenly, the door flew open. On the other side stood Teal'C and Sam Carter, who both looked extremely apologetic. "I'm sorry!" cried Sam impulsively. "I didn't mean to be late, only…" She stopped.  
  
"Well?" demanded General Hammond, but he dropped his angry tone when he saw Sam's face.  
  
The team's other scientist had frozen and paled. Her blue eyes were haunted with fear.  
  
"Carter?" said Jack. "Sam?"  
  
Sam took a step back. "Goa'uld," she muttered.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Goa'uld! There's a Goa'uld in this room!" Sam was almost shouting.  
  
"Uh, Carter," said Jack, as gently as he could, "I'm sure there isn't."  
  
"With all due respect, Colonel, I can sense Goa'uld, and you can't," said Sam acidly. "When I say I can sense one of them here now, I mean it."  
  
"Could you be sensing Teal'C's symbiote?" asked the general. "It is technically a Goa'uld." He pointed at Teal'C where he stood. Teal'C did bear a Goa'uld within him, but in its larval form it acted as his immune system, forming a true symbiotic partnership, unlike the adult Goa'uld, which were true parasites.  
  
"For God's sake, Colonel, I know what I'm talking about!" cried Sam. "There is a Goa'uld here! You have to believe me!"  
  
Ignoring the insubordination, Jack turned and looked round the room. The general and Daniel had stood up, and they moved towards Sam along with Jack in an attempt to calm her down.  
  
Sam had frozen again, rooted to the spot. Jack looked away for one second… and he saw it.  
  
Daniel had frozen just like Sam. Suddenly, he swayed, stumbling forwards and almost falling, but in a few seconds his head lifted. The rest of SG-1 and the general looked on in horror as Daniel's blue eyes flamed amber and gold, 'the colour of evil' as Jack had once put it.  
  
"Oh, my God!" exclaimed the team's leader. Desperately trying to reach his friend before it was too late, he shouted: "Daniel… Danny… can you hear me? Daniel!"  
  
For a few seconds, it seemed to be working. Suddenly, Daniel screamed and cried out in pain: "No! No! Jack, kill me! Don't leave me like this! Kill me!"  
  
"Silence!" It was Daniel's voice, but not soft and gentle. Daniel's voice, the harsh, twisted version, the voice of the alien parasite taking over his mind. "This host… is unusual."  
  
Jack felt ready to explode. "You have five seconds to get out of him before I kill you!" he threatened, aiming a zat gun Teal'C had handed him.  
  
"Be calm," said the Goa'uld. The harsh, disturbing voice reminded Jack of Ra, Apophis, Hathor, Sokar, a million other Goa'uld they had killed. The Goa'uld in Daniel, however, was more shocking and horrifying than any of them, mainly because Jack could see how Daniel's eyes had lost their soft charm, replaced by the blank evil that characterised the eyes of a host.  
  
The Goa'uld was still talking. "If you shoot, you will only succeed in harming your friend's body. Besides, you care for Daniel too much to let any harm come to him."  
  
"You heard him," declared Jack grimly. "He'd rather die now than live with a snake inside his head."  
  
"Is that so?" said the alien silkily, smiling, making Jack turned to face Daniel – no, not Daniel. He tried to shake himself into letting go of the belief he was talking to Daniel. The being talking to him was not – repeat, was not – his friend.  
  
"I am not here to harm you, Tau'ri. I am Tok'ra. My name is Zelnar."  
  
At this statement, they turned as one to face Sam. "Is it true, Carter?" Jack asked. "Is he really a Tok'ra?"  
  
"I don't know!" Sam exclaimed. "If he is, Jolinar never knew him. There's no way of knowing."  
  
"I have not tried to hurt you in any way," offered Zelnar. "I am not Goa'uld, I give you my word."  
  
"And just how trustworthy is your word?" demanded Jack, suddenly angry again. Daniel's eyes had faded back to blue, and some of the harshness was going out of his voice, thoroughly scaring the colonel, who could not shake off the impression that this was Daniel talking to him.  
  
"If you are Tok'ra," said Sam determinedly, "then give Daniel control now."  
  
"As you wish."  
  
There was a pause. "Daniel?" said Jack hopefully.  
  
  
  
Daniel swore to himself – to what was left of himself – that after this he would never wander off again, ever. He had been on that planet, he remembered that much. He'd gone off for just one minute, just one minute, and he'd found what looked like a dead Jaffa lying on the ground. Why had he been interested? Oh, yes, it was because of the fact the dead Jaffa didn't seem to have a tattoo or insignia of any kind. He'd always thought that all Jaffa bore the sign of the Goa'uld they served. If he didn't, that would make him a Goa'uld himself, and no Goa'uld would lie dead out here, unattended, so that didn't make sense either. Daniel had taken a few steps forwards, and the dead man's mouth had opened…  
  
The snake, the Goa'uld, ventured blindly into the light, giving that nightmarish squealing sound Daniel knew to dread, hunting for a host. Daniel had tried to run… but it was too late. He'd tried keeping his mouth firmly shut, but that hadn't stopped the snake, who had leapt at him and simply taken the shortest route – through the back of his neck…  
  
Hush, little one.  
  
Get out of me! Daniel screamed inwardly. Snake!  
  
I will not harm you. You are an unusual host, though you are still so young. What is your name?  
  
Leave me alone! Daniel screamed. I'm not going to be host to a Goa'uld!  
  
I am not Goa'uld. I am a Tok'ra. My name is Zelnar. Your name is… Daniel? Daniel, I will not harm you. I am a Tok'ra. I hate the Goa'uld just as you do. See, I will give you control. Talk to your friends, little one. They are worried about you.  
  
  
  
"Daniel?" said Jack again. "Daniel, can you hear me?"  
  
Daniel didn't look up. After a pause, he spoke, in a low, monotonous tone. "Yes."  
  
"Is he a Tok'ra?" Sam demanded. "Daniel, we have to know. Can you keep control?"  
  
Yes, little one. Keep control. Zelnar was amicable, thinking Daniel a strange human indeed, but essentially a wise one.  
  
"Yes," said Daniel quietly. "He is a Tok'ra. His name is Zelnar."  
  
"Daniel?" said Sam tentatively. "Are you… are you all right?" She swore at herself under her breath once she'd said it, because it sounded so pathetic… so stupid. In the space of a few hours, Daniel had become a host to a snake in his head, simultaneously having his own worst nightmare realised, and here she was, inanely asking him if he was all right.  
  
Fortunately for Sam, she never got a reply. Daniel/Zelnar suddenly froze and then crumpled to the ground. Teal'C, like he had so many times before, though never like this, picked Daniel's body up and carried him out.  
  
  
  
"Incoming traveller!" The alarms sounded throughout the base. SG-1 hurried to the control room, all looking eagerly through the glass at the Stargate, watching each one of its chevrons light up, and finally, the huge plasma wash that settled into the event horizon of the wormhole.  
  
"Is there a code?" Jack asked Sam and the Gate technicians.  
  
"No… no… yes! Open the iris!"  
  
Down in the Gate room, the huge metal iris spun out of the way of the wormhole. After a pause, two figures stumbled out of its shimmering surface. SG-1 recognised them instantly, and ran down to the Gate room as one.  
  
"Dad!" yelled Sam.  
  
Jacob Carter, her father, smiled broadly at the sight of his daughter. "Sam, it's good to see you. Jack, Teal'C, good to see you too. Martouf, what are you doing?"  
  
"I'm here," said Martouf. "Sam!"  
  
"Hi, Martouf," said Sam. "You remember Colonel O'Neill and Teal'C?"  
  
"How could he forget?" murmured Jack under his breath as he greeted Martouf and Jacob. Jacob himself, however, seemed puzzled. "Where's Daniel?" he asked.  
  
"Uh, Dad," said Sam, "we have a situation. Could we speak to Selmak, do you think?"  
  
Jacob Carter lowered his head, then lifted it again. The harsh voice of the Tok'ra Selmak rang out. "Greetings, Samantha."  
  
"Selmak," said Jack, coming to the point, "do you know a Tok'ra called Zelnar?"  
  
"Zelnar?" repeated Selmak. "She is a rebel. She has been missing for many years, and frankly we weren't sorry to see him go. We do not know if she is dead, but we have had no word of her for a long time."  
  
"I have never met her," added Martouf.  
  
"Neither have I," cut in Lantash, the Tok'ra in Martouf.  
  
"Well, things are about to change," said Jack. "We have something important to tell you…"  
  
Following their collapse, Teal'C had carried Daniel/Zelnar into the infirmary, but surprisingly enough, Janet hadn't been able to find anything wrong with either Goa'uld or host. "Uh, doc," said Jack. "People don't collapse for no reason."  
  
"Too much caffeine, not enough sleep," responded the doctor. Janet was a doctor, but as Chief Medical Officer of the Stargate Project, she sometimes wondered whether this was what she'd had in mind when she'd chosen her career. The things she had to cope with… there was that Neanderthal plague from the Land of Light… incredibly accelerated aging on Argos… not to mention the weird brainwashing chemicals Hathor had used… For once, it was nice to deal with a perfectly ordinary complaint, not enough sleep and too much coffee. At least, it would have been an ordinary complaint, if the person concerned hadn't had a snake in his head.  
  
"Too much caffeine, not enough sleep?" repeated Jack, bewildered. "But that's just Daniel. That's what he does."  
  
"It's what Daniel does," agreed the doctor. "But the Goa'uld doesn't seem to appreciate it."  
  
"So that's all that's wrong?" asked Jack.  
  
"Well, not quite, Colonel," said Janet. "I just thought you should know… this Goa'uld did not enter Daniel through his mouth."  
  
"You mean…?" The team leader couldn't finish it.  
  
"Yes, that is exactly what I mean," Janet told him, suppressing a shudder as she thought about it.  
  
Ugh. Don't think about it, Jack, he told himself. You're in the military, you can cope with this. Just don't think about it.  
  
But he couldn't stop himself. He'd seen Goa'uld without hosts, the slimy, squealing snakes with the horrifically sharp teeth, and he could just picture it… the snake, lunging forwards, sinking its teeth into the back of Daniel's neck… Until now, the archaeologist's overlong hair had covered the wound, and so no-one had seen until it was too late. Although… If he looked carefully, Jack could see where the blonde of Daniel's hair was stained brown and red with blood. Ugh…  
  
"Martouf, Jacob, Lantash," said Jack O'Neill, "meet Zelnar."  
  
They were in a VIP room the general had considerately lent them, considering the circumstances. Seeing as he was only asleep, the doc had consented to Teal'C carrying Daniel/Zelnar here and laying him on a convenient chair.  
  
"Oh, my God," said Jacob after a pause. "Daniel?"  
  
"Yes," said Sam. "We think it got into him on the planet we were just on – there was a war between some minor Goa'ulds – and Daniel was separated from us for a few minutes. We never realised what had happened till we got back to Earth, and I sensed it."  
  
"Jacob, please let me speak," said Selmak at this point. After a pause, she added, "Thank you," and continued, "I knew Zelnar well. She is a rebel, as I said before. Some time ago, she committed a crime so heinous that she was banished from our ranks, and we never saw her again."  
  
"What was the crime?" asked Martouf curiously.  
  
"She took a host against his will. The host was very much distressed at the time."  
  
"Gee, I wonder why?" commented Jack sarcastically.  
  
"The host did appear to come to terms with it later," said Selmak thoughtfully. "In any case, both Zelnar and her host disappeared some time later, and that was the last time either of them were seen or heard of."  
  
"So what are you saying?" asked Sam. "The thing in Daniel is definitely Tok'ra? It won't try and take him over completely?"  
  
"We have no way of knowing," said Selmak. "On the one hand, she is a born Tok'ra, and before she took that host, she was basically good and honest. But this is two hosts she has taken against their will, and added to the fact she went through the back of Daniel's neck…" Even Jacob/Selmak shuddered at that thought, Jack noticed.  
  
Jacob/Selmak stood up. "I must speak to the Tok'ra High Council concerning this matter," said Selmak. "I will go now. Martouf/Lantash will remain."  
  
"How long?" asked Sam anxiously.  
  
"Twenty-four hours, not more." The voice of the Tok'ra suddenly changed into Jacob's voice. "That's a promise, Sam," he said. "We'll be back."  
  
"Hang on, hang on!" exclaimed Jack. "You haven't said what we're supposed to do while you're gone. Do we trust what's-her-name, Zelnar?"  
  
"No," said Selmak. "Restrain her, imprison her, use whatever means necessary."  
  
"Now see," said Jack, "I don't want to do that, 'cos basically we'd be tying Daniel up too, and I don't want that. Is there any other way?"  
  
"A sedative?" suggested Sam.  
  
"A high dose will be needed, but I don't see why not," agreed Selmak. With that, Jacob/Selmak went out.  
  
A short while later, Sam saw to the Stargate dial out herself, and Jacob/Selmak left through the shimmering wormhole.  
  
  
  
"Colonel O'Neill?"  
  
"Doc?" Jack replied, wondering why she had woken him in the middle of the night. He, Sam, and Teal'C had elected to stay on base overnight, seeing as Jacob/Selmak could return at any time, but the team leader had thought it best to get some sleep, as they had absolutely no idea what was going to happen tomorrow.  
  
"It's Daniel. Come!"  
  
Sleepily, Jack got up and made his way to the infirmary. He knew the way there perfectly, even with his eyes shut. Between them, he and Daniel had spent so much time here that Janet's nurses were considering offering them frequent flyer miles.  
  
"What's up, doc?" he asked on his arrival. Janet rolled her eyes. Even in the valley of the shadow of death, Colonel Jack O'Neill, USAF, would not stop making wisecracks.  
  
"Daniel's having nightmares, and we can't wake him from them. He's called out for you, so I thought you might know what to do."  
  
This time, Jack rolled his eyes. He listened to Daniel's screams, and shivered. Oh, Daniel, what a night…  
  
Idly, Jack wondered exactly how many commanding officers in the Stargate programme were compelled to get up in the middle of the night to soothe their younger teammates' nightmares.  
  
But that wasn't quite fair. It wasn't one of his duties as a CO, after all. He could leave Daniel to scream if he liked. The truth was, Daniel was his friend. His best friend. There was no way he'd leave him to the mercy of whatever demons haunted his dreams.  
  
But was there another, more selfish reason? The truth was, Jack couldn't bear the sound of Daniel's screams. Jack felt like he would do anything, anything at all, if those screams would just stop, stop haunting him, stop ringing through his own dreams. Weren't people supposed to grow out of nightmares aged six or so? Daniel had never really opened up about his own past to Jack, but he'd heard those screams, screams that sounded just like the frenzied terror of a very young child. Which was what Daniel was, in a way. Jack had never stopped thinking of Sam and Daniel as the kids. Yeah, sure, they were both grown up, both with intelligence quotients off the charts, and had been respectively engaged and married, to his eyes, they were… kids. He wasn't sure which one was younger. He wasn't sure it mattered.  
  
"Daniel! Danny, calm down, it's only us…" He laid a hand on the young archaeologist's blonde head, and he stirred and said something Jack didn't understand. Jack himself wasn't surprised. Almost certainly, Daniel dreamed in a mixture of all the twenty-three languages he spoke. However, Jack did recognise the language, although he didn't understand it. Trying not to wonder what Daniel was dreaming about that would make him speak the language of the Goa'uld, Jack soothed his friend, hoping the Goa'uld within him was asleep…  
  
  
  
  
  
Daniel was asleep and dreaming.  
  
1 No! No! Don't leave me here! Don't leave me alone! Please! Please…  
  
2 Daniel!  
  
3 Please!  
  
Daniel! Hush, child, you were dreaming.  
  
4 Zelnar?  
  
It is I. You were having nightmares, Daniel, so I woke you. Such terrible dreams… No host I have ever known has dreamt such dreams as this. Tell me, of what were you dreaming?  
  
It's nothing, Zelnar. Thanks for waking me.  
  
Tell me about it, child. You will not sleep peacefully if you do not.  
  
5 Why do you call me 'child?'  
  
I am hundreds of years older than you are, child. Allow me the wisdom of age. Zelnar gave her equivalent of gentle laughter, and it filled Daniel's head, calming him.  
  
6 So? Of what were you dreaming?  
  
Something that happened a long time ago. It's nothing you need to worry your snaky little head about.  
  
You seem to delight in making me laugh, Daniel. You are a most unusual human.  
  
And you've had plenty of experience with humans, I suppose?  
  
Yes, I have. I have had many hosts. But like I said before, you are the youngest, and you are also the strangest.  
  
Why strangest?  
  
Your wisdom is greater than your years, but there is a part of your mind that is hidden away, that hides part of yourself away.  
  
And what does that mean?  
  
You are alone.  
  
What?  
  
More than that, you are lonely. You are the loneliest person I have ever known. You seem to stand alone, and though your friends have tried to see into the part of yourself you have hidden, you will not allow it. You are drowning in your own loneliness… and you are having nightmares.  
  
Zelnar, you seem to forget I'm not alone. I can't be alone, because I have a talking snake inside my head.  
  
Bitterness. Loneliness. Nightmares. Will you not take my advice, little one? Tell me about it.  
  
And why should I take your advice?  
  
I know what it is to be alone.  
  
Whatever you say, snake.  
  
I know. Trust me. I am not Goa'uld – I hate them and their kind. But I am not Tok'ra either, not since I was banished. So what am I? I am nothing and I am no-one. I belong to none and none belongs to me.  
  
Why were you banished?  
  
I took a host against his will. I was desperate to survive, and although the host was also dying, he bore the usual Tau'ri aversion to becoming a host. I did not wait for him to agree, and I simply took him over. I was young and arrogant. But in time, he and I became as one, truly blended like we should be. But even so, I was banished. The crime was too much for the Tok'ra to forgive. So I and my host have wandered the galaxy, always alone, until just yesterday, when he was killed in battle. And although I grieve for his death, I myself did not have to die. I took over the nearest human capable of being a host.  
  
Me.  
  
Yes, Daniel, you.  
  
I'm sorry for you, Zelnar. I guess I should be angry, but I'm sorry.  
  
As am I for you, Daniel. You, too, have no-one.  
  
Family, you mean? I don't have any family… well, almost.  
  
Is this concerned with the dream you were having?  
  
What is this fixation with my dreams, Zelnar? Why do you want to know?  
  
Because if you do not tell anyone about them, they will turn inward. That way, you will never sleep.  
  
All right, all right. I was dreaming about… my parents.  
  
They are dead?  
  
Yes. They were killed when I was eight.  
  
In front of your eyes. Cruel, child. That was a cruel, cruel thing to happen. But you had other family?  
  
Only my grandfather. He was an archaeologist, like me. He was busy, didn't have much time for a child…  
  
He abandoned you.  
  
Yes.  
  
But what of Sha're?  
  
Sha're? She's my wife. She came from Abydos.  
  
But she is no more.  
  
She isn't dead. She was taken… by the Goa'uld. She's a host now. Apophis has her. I haven't seen her for a long time…  
  
And you… you are alone.  
  
Yes.  
  
You see? You and I are alike in some ways. But now, you must sleep, Daniel. Your friends – they worry about you. They do not trust me, do not trust my promise I will not harm you in any way.  
  
You won't harm me?  
  
I will not even take control of you. But I will not leave. I need life, and I have a right to it, just as you do. Now, sleep. Sleep… sleep…  
  
  
  
Jack sensed a change in his friend's breathing. He smiled as he realised Daniel was sleeping peacefully, sleep without nightmares. He relaxed a little himself, sinking wearily back into his own chair. It wasn't one of those hard plastic, grotesquely uncomfortable chairs Janet seemed to love torturing her patients' visitors with. Seeing as Jack spent so much of his life here, waiting for Daniel to wake up from whatever it was that had had hit him this time, she'd given him, glory of glories, a comfortable squashy chair. Gradually, Jack O'Neill fell asleep too.  
  
Looking in a little later, Janet smiled at the scene. Daniel, sound asleep, and Jack, just as sound asleep, with a smile on his face and one hand still on his young friend's tousled blonde head.  
  
Four hours later, the base was beginning to come alive. It was five am, and the nurses and the Gate technicians were going off their night shift. And although she would have liked to, Janet knew she couldn't leave Jack and Daniel here all day. Silently, she made her way into the room, and reached out to shake Jack awake.  
  
A minute of continuous shaking later, and the colonel hadn't stirred. Janet was baffled. She took a minute to check on Daniel, and found him to be deeply asleep. She estimated it would be at least another ten or twelve hours before he woke. The sedative appeared to be doing its job.  
  
"Unscheduled Gate activation! Incoming traveller!" The announcement and alarms sounded throughout the base. Jack opened his eyes and stared wildly around him. But he was on his feet in an instant. "Sorry doc!" he cried. "No time to talk!"  
  
With that, he ran out the room and towards the Gate room, leaving Janet staring after him in bemusement. The doctor started to laugh. Between them, SG-1 had caused more trouble for her than all the other teams put together, and yet she wasn't immune to their collective charm. She turned… and froze in astonishment.  
  
Daniel was sitting up, watching her intently. But Janet knew that it wasn't Daniel. The lack of the puppy-dog expression was enough to convince her of that, and a moment later, the blue eyes flared gold and amber.  
  
"Tau'ri."  
  
"What do you want?" Janet demanded. She was a doctor, damnit! She was not supposed to treat anyone in her care with anything else but the utmost gentleness and courtesy. But when it was a snake inhabiting the body of one of her closest friends, she found that difficult.  
  
"The Tok'ra have arrived."  
  
"Is that it?" Janet asked, trying to keep any hatred out of her voice, and failing dismally.  
  
"Yes. The human Daniel shall have control from here on in." The harsh voice gradually faded away, and so did the amber in the eyes, to be replaced by the soft voice and deep blue eyes of the young archaeologist. "Hi, Janet," said Daniel sleepily.  
  
"Daniel?"  
  
"It's me, Janet," Daniel said. "I've got control."  
  
"You'll have to answer a few questions, Daniel," she warned him.  
  
"Aww, do I have to?" Daniel pleaded. The doctor resisted the urge to give in to those puppy-dog eyes, even though she was inwardly convinced Daniel had control. He must have control to bear that particular expression so convincingly. Janet had often thought that part of Daniel had never grown up, and was still a cute five-year-old playing in the sands of Egypt.  
  
"Yes, Daniel, I'm afraid you do. What's your full name?"  
  
"Daniel Jackson."  
  
"Birthday?"  
  
"July 8th. Come on, Janet, it's me! The Tok'ra promised me control. I've been in control since yesterday night."  
  
"You weren't five minutes ago," challenged the doctor. "The Goa'uld talked to me briefly. He said the Tok'ra had arrived."  
  
"Have they?"  
  
"I have absolutely no idea. Just one moment." She went quickly over to the observation window, and saw what she expected – SG-1, with Jacob/Selmak in tow. "Yes, Daniel, Jacob's here," she told him. There was no reply. "Daniel?"  
  
Daniel had fallen asleep. Janet thought briefly how cute he was when he fell asleep on her, and then hurried to the door to admit SG-1.  
  
"He's asleep," she told them as they entered.  
  
"Wasn't he supposed to be?" asked Sam in surprise. "You said the sedative was working."  
  
"He was awake five minutes ago," responded Janet. "But he's out of it again for now."  
  
"Who has control?" asked Jacob suddenly.  
  
"I'm guessing Daniel does, though I can't be sure," Janet told him. Jacob lowered his head, and a second later Selmak spoke. "This is good."  
  
"What is?"  
  
"I had feared that perhaps Zelnar had reverted to Goa'uld ways completely and totally taken over her host. But then again, if you are not sure…"  
  
"I'm almost sure," Janet insisted.  
  
"Has Daniel spoken to you in his own voice since the blending?" Selmak asked.  
  
"Yes." The answer came from several people.  
  
"So?" That was Sam. "What did the Tok'ra High Council say?"  
  
Selmak's response was brief and to the point. "Send Daniel to Cimmeria."  
  
"Cimmeria? Isn't that a little… drastic?" Sam asked in alarm.  
  
"Zelnar will be no loss," Selmak said. "She has been nothing but a thorn in the side of the Tok'ra, and for what she has done she deserves her fate, to die at the hands of the Asgard."  
  
"That's not what I meant," Sam insisted. "What if Zelnar is too stubborn? She and Daniel will die together!"  
  
For a few minutes, the only sound in the room was Daniel's breathing. The doctor, SG-1, and Jacob/Selmak were digesting Sam's words.  
  
"What would you have?" said Selmak suddenly and passionately, making Jacob's eyes glow. "I have never spent very much time among you of the Tau'ri, but even I see why you value Daniel Jackson's life, and the love you collectively hold for him. What would you have? Would you have him live a thousand years, held prisoner in his own mind and body? Or would you rather take the chance, and live with the fact that perhaps your friend could die an honourable death for our cause? Or most likely of all, Daniel could be taken to Cimmeria and soon return, to live out his natural life in peace and freedom?"  
  
There was more silence. Not for nothing was Selmak the oldest and wisest of the Tok'ra. Her wisdom had been gathered over ages.  
  
"Wake Daniel," said Jack finally.  
  
"I'm sorry, am I missing something here?" asked Janet. "Which planet was Cimmeria?"  
  
"Thor's Hammer," Jack explained, and Janet flinched. That wasn't Jack's job. The person on the team who answered hers and everyone else's questions was Daniel.  
  
"Thor's Hammer was a device of great power," said Teal'C. "It can sense a Goa'uld upon its arrival through the Stargate."  
  
"Then, it zaps the Goa'uld away to a place called the Labyrinth," Sam continued. "It's this place, this big maze thing apparently, and there's only one exit."  
  
"And in front of it's this big Thor's Hammer thingy." That was Jack, obviously. "It takes the Goa'uld from the host and kills it."  
  
"Wait just one second," said Janet. "Didn't you people destroy Thor's Hammer?"  
  
"Yeah, we did," said Jack. "But Thor's Asgard buddies replaced it for us. Gotta love those guys."  
  
"So only the host survives and leaves the Labyrinth," Sam finished. "But the problem is that if the Goa'uld is stubborn enough, it'll just stay there with its host until they both die of starvation."  
  
"And you're afraid that's what Zelnar will do to Daniel?" asked Jacob. Despite the fact he was Selmak's host, he really didn't know as much about the matter as SG-1 and the Tok'ra.  
  
"Wake Daniel," Jack repeated. But they were too late for that. Daniel's eyes opened, and immediately flared amber gold.  
  
"Zelnar," said Selmak acidly. "For your crimes, you are to be sent to the planet of Cimmeria."  
  
"I understand." There was no more rebellion from the renegade Tok'ra. Zelnar had accepted her fate as death at the hands of the Asgard.  
  
"I am glad of that. Now please give Daniel control," Selmak said evenly. For a second, nothing happened, and then Daniel's eyes faded back to blue.  
  
"Daniel?" said Jack. "Danny?" He knew using the nickname would rouse Daniel – there was nothing that irritated the young scientist more than being called that.  
  
"I'm here, Jack," said Daniel in his normal soft voice.  
  
"We're sending you to Cimmeria, Daniel," Jack told him. "You'll end up in the Labyrinth, remember? You'll have to go through Thor's Hammer."  
  
"When?" Daniel was still a little dazed and unfocused from the after- effects of the sedative.  
  
"Now," said Selmak, suddenly taking control over Jacob.  
  
"Whoa!" Jack said. "Now? You can't send Daniel into a maze now! He's doped!"  
  
"I agree with Colonel O'Neill," Janet said. "Can't we give it some time?"  
  
"It must be now," Selmak said. "The sooner it is done, the easier it will be for Daniel afterwards."  
  
Five minutes later, Jack and Jacob/Selmak stood at the base of the Gate ramp, watching the seven chevrons light up one by one as the technicians dialled Cimmeria's Stargate address. Behind them, one of the doors opened, and Teal'C entered. He was carrying the sleeping Daniel as if he weighed nothing at all. As the Stargate activated, Teal'C and Jack made their way up the ramp. Jack was going through to warn Gairwyn about what they were doing, and hopefully they could get Daniel out quickly and take him home.  
  
"Ready?" called Jacob from the bottom of the ramp. Like Teal'C, he wasn't risking coming anywhere near the Gate. Thor's Hammer was of course unable to tell the difference between Jaffa and Tok'ra and Goa'uld, and Jacob liked Selmak too much to lose her.  
  
"Ready as we'll ever be," Jack responded, and taking the unconscious archaeologist in his arms, made his way up to the shimmering event horizon.  
  
"Jack?"  
  
"Yes, Danny," Jack replied, watching the shimmering light of the Stargate flicker over his young friend's face.  
  
"Where are you taking me?"  
  
"Ah, Danny, we're supposed to have been over this. We're going to Cimmeria. Thor's Hammer, remember? It'll get the snake out of you."  
  
"Cimmeria? No!" Daniel struggled suddenly, trying to make Jack drop him onto the Gate ramp. "Jack, you can't do that!"  
  
"I know, I know," Jack told him gently, making him settle and remain still. "I didn't want to do this to you either. You'll be alone for a while, but you'll get out of the maze thingy, promise. And I'm going through to tell Gairwyn about it – she'll help me get you home in no time. And in the meantime, Danny, you're no light weight, so if we could just…"  
  
"Jack, no!" Daniel was fighting to stay awake, but he knew inwardly he had to make Jack listen or else it would be too late. "Please! Zelnar!" He struggled a little more, and Jack gave up the unequal struggle with gravity and dropped Daniel unceremoniously onto the ramp.  
  
Up in the control room, Sam and Jacob/Selmak, and the general were watching in astonishment as Colonel O'Neill dropped his team-mate and sat moodily on the ramp. Behind them, the Stargate waited in vain.  
  
"Colonel O'Neill?" General Hammond called through the mike. "What's the delay?"  
  
"Uh, well…" Jack began. "It seems we have a problem."  
  
Back in the briefing room, he tried to explain.  
  
"What are you saying?" Sam asked. "Daniel doesn't want to go?" She motioned towards her friend, who had fallen into a deep sleep immediately following his removal from the Gate room, and was now lying across two chairs until they could figure out just what the hell to do with him.  
  
"That's what it sounded like," Jack admitted. "I told him we'd be there and he wouldn't be in the maze for long, but he called out the snake's name before he passed out again."  
  
"It would appear," said Selmak suddenly, "that Daniel Jackson does not want Zelnar to die."  
  
"What?" asked Jack.  
  
"If Daniel does not want Zelnar to be killed by the Asgard, then we must abide by his wishes. Ultimately, the decision should be made by the host."  
  
"But why?" Sam asked. "Why doesn't Daniel want Zelnar killed?"  
  
"He may have formed an understanding with the parasite. Such things are not unknown," Selmak said gravely.  
  
"Oh, for cryin' out loud!" Jack leapt to his feet. "He gets a snake inside his head, and the kid has to go and make friends with it! I'm sorry, but that is just not possible."  
  
"What other explanation have you to give, Colonel O'Neill?" asked Selmak gently.  
  
"Look, no offence to him, but the kid's not exactly in his right mind right now, is he?" Jack demanded. "The snake's not doing wonders for his common sense, is it? I say, send him through the Gate, and get him back again. Then he'll be talking sense again."  
  
"Excuse me, Colonel." They all turned; they seemed to have forgotten the doctor was in the room. "Listen to me," Janet said. "With all due respect, please remember the last time we considered Daniel to be losing his mind."  
  
Doc, what did you have to do that for? Jack thought to himself. He hated thinking of that time, hated it. There was that image of Daniel, his best friend, and also just a kid, crying softly in the padded room because he, Jack O'Neill, had made that phone call and had him carted off to County Medical Health. If any of them had just taken the time to listen to Daniel for one second, they'd have realised he wasn't crazy, but no, it took Daniel's own wits to get him out of that place. In short, Daniel had trusted Jack, and he'd let the kid down. In a very big way. And he'd just been about to do it again, throwing his friend through the Gate without even listening to the kid. At least he hadn't done it before, when he'd dropped Daniel on the Gate ramp. At least he'd come back to talk to Jacob/Selmak.  
  
"All right," he said quietly. "You're right, Doc. We should listen to what Daniel has to say."  
  
"Dad?" asked Sam at this point. "What do you think we should do?"  
  
"I think," said her father gravely, "we should listen to 'the oldest and wisest' among us." And with that he turned control over to Selmak.  
  
"Well, Selmak?" asked Sam. "I know you said it's Daniel's right to choose, but what do you think? Is this a good idea?"  
  
"Samantha," said Selmak in her harsh voice, "I think this is an excellent idea. It will give Daniel protection against the Goa'uld. You know the interest they have always shown in him."  
  
"Well, yeah, but haven't the Goa'uld shown interest in all of us at some point?" Sam asked. "It's not just Daniel who has that problem."  
  
"The Goa'uld are interested in Colonel O'Neill because he is your team leader," said Selmak. "They have shown interest in you, Samantha, because of what you still carry of Jolinar. Teal'C they are interested in because he is the shol'va, the traitor. But the Goa'uld are interested in Daniel Jackson for himself alone. This is something you should be concerned about."  
  
"What?" Sam exclaimed. "The Goa'uld want Daniel? Why?"  
  
"Surely you can see what a good host for a Goa'uld he would make. But that is not the only reason they want him. Before her death, there was one Goa'uld who wanted him for a different reason."  
  
"Hathor?" Janet guessed.  
  
"Yes. Hathor, mother of all pharaohs. She wanted him not as a host, but as a… possession."  
  
"A possession?" exclaimed Jack.  
  
"Daniel…" said Janet.  
  
"Hathor…" said Sam.  
  
"Ugh!" they said simultaneously. Janet and Sam knew more about this than any of the others, probably because, being female, they had been the only ones unaffected by Hathor's brainwashing chemicals on her first visit to the SGC. After that particular episode, Daniel had seemed to recover. He'd got over it. But Sam would never forget how she'd found Daniel after what Hathor had done to him. "He was in shock, Janet," she'd told the doctor afterwards. "Daniel was catatonic."  
  
Hathor's obsession with their gentle young archaeologist was decidedly creepy, to say the least, and then after what she did to him…  
  
All Jack knew about that came from Daniel's offhanded comment about the DNA they'd found amidst the mess. And he had been telling the truth, because they certainly had found traces of Daniel's DNA mixed with Hathor's. And just how had the mixing happened? It didn't take a genius to figure it out. One thing Jack did know for certain was he slept better at night now he knew the 'mother of all pharaohs' was dead.  
  
"I don't understand!" Sam exclaimed. "Why would Daniel make a good host?"  
  
Selmak didn't say anything for a minute. When she spoke, it was into a dead silence. "Consider what Daniel has done for you. If it was not for him, you would never have discovered the truth about the rebellion of your ancestors in Ancient Egypt. If it were not for him, the Stargate would never have been opened. Indirectly, if it were not for Daniel, you would not be the threat to the Goa'uld that you are today."  
  
More silence. After a pause, Selmak went on: "Picture this. Picture Daniel's knowledge, his intelligence, his wisdom, in the hands of the Goa'uld. Picture the atrocities they could commit, the evil they could bring upon the galaxy through Daniel's hands."  
  
Jack really, really wished that Selmak would drop her 'prophet of doom' way of talking once in a while. But the thing was, he knew she was right. Although he'd never heard it put like this before, looking at the sleeping young archaeologist, he knew he was looking at one of Earth's greatest assets in the war against the Goa'uld. But he also knew he was looking at his best friend, and that made all the difference.  
  
"Selmak, what are you saying?" asked the general suddenly, making Jack jump.  
  
"I am saying what I believe you should know. I have often felt you do not fully understand how valuable a tool Daniel would be in the hands of the Goa'uld. But today, if he so chooses, one threat can be eliminated, and Daniel can never become host to a Goa'uld."  
  
"But what about Zelnar?" Sam asked. "Is she really much better than a Goa'uld? Remember, we're talking about Daniel's worst nightmare here – being a host."  
  
"Back of the neck, people," muttered Jack. "Back of the neck."  
  
"Jack?" The soft voice carried to every corner of the room.  
  
"Daniel!"  
  
Daniel, although he had a reputation for being extremely good at talking, was still a good listener. So was Zelnar. She had wisely stayed silent as Daniel listened to the leader of the Tok'ra coldly and precisely define Daniel's place in the universe.  
  
The youngest member of SG-1 stood up and looked around the room. "Selmak, I'm flattered," he said calmly. "I'm in your debt. You are the oldest and wisest among us, but mine is the right to decide Zelnar's fate from here on in."  
  
"Speak, Daniel," Selmak urged. "Speak."  
  
  
  
7 Two weeks later  
  
Jack O'Neill was standing in the commissary with a cup of steaming hot coffee in his hands. But he didn't drink it. It just didn't feel right, drinking coffee without Daniel, and so he poured an extra cup and went in search of his missing friend. He found him exactly where he'd expected to, in his study, surrounded by piles of books.  
  
"Daniel!" Jack called. Daniel stood up, turning to face him… and his eyes flamed yellow gold.  
  
"Whoa!" Jack exclaimed guiltily. "Uh… hi, Zelnar."  
  
"Greetings, Colonel O'Neill," came the reply, in the harsh version of Daniel's voice, and Jack took a deep breath, trying not to think of the Goa'uld.  
  
There was a long silence, which was only broken by the sound of soft laughter. Daniel was watching Jack intently, eyes back to deep blue. "Ah," he said. "I see you two are past that awkward stage."  
  
"Don't you start getting sarcastic in your old age, Danny-boy, or you ain't gettin' no coffee."  
  
Daniel took the proffered cup thankfully.  
  
That's weird.  
  
What is? asked Zelnar, picking up on Daniel's thoughts in an instant, just like she always did.  
  
I just had a thought. I really am going to live longer than Jack, aren't I?  
  
You will live for many hundreds of years, Daniel. There are very few injuries to the human body that I cannot heal.  
  
What will I do? You know, when everyone I know is dead?  
  
Do you think you will never meet new people, Daniel? Your friends will die, and you will grieve for them. But your life will go on. And one day, there will be others, who will grieve for your death when that day shall come.  
  
Did I mention what a morbid conversationalist you are, Zelnar?  
  
Did I mention how much I appreciate your sense of humour, Daniel?  
  
Well, you're the only one who does. Jack certainly doesn't.  
  
That is because he does not understand what you say. He does not understand what Major Carter says, either.  
  
Sam? No-one understands her!  
  
I see. What is this you have been given? I believe you call it… coffee?  
  
Ah, Zelnar, you shouldn't have to ask me that. You're supposed to know everything I know.  
  
All I know of coffee is that it contains a substance that you are very heavily addicted to.  
  
Caffeine? Everyone at Stargate Command is addicted to caffeine. You'll see.  
  
I am sure I will, Zelnar thought, making Daniel smile.  
  
"Daniel? Daniel!" Jack tried in vain to get his friend's attention. "What are you smiling at?"  
  
"Nothing," said Daniel, still smiling. "Nothing at all."  
  
Jack wandered out of the room, deep in thought, but as he left, Samantha Carter entered. "Hi, Daniel," she greeted him.  
  
"Hi," Daniel replied, dropping his head. Instinctively, Sam knew Zelnar was about to speak. "Hi, Zelnar," she said easily. "Are you looking after Daniel? Making sure he doesn't drink too much coffee?"  
  
"To the contrary, Samantha, Daniel has just been telling me all about what coffee is. I have never had it before. Apparently it is addictive?"  
  
Zelnar's harsh voice didn't affect Sam the way it affected the colonel. "Addictive?" she said. "You have no idea. Let me talk to Daniel, would you, Zelnar?"  
  
Daniel/Zelnar's head dropped, and lifted. "I'm here, Sam," said Daniel softly. "What did you want to talk to me about?"  
  
"Nothing, really," Sam said. "I just wanted to see if Zelnar would give you control if I asked her."  
  
"For the last time, Sam, I trust her!" Daniel exclaimed. "I saved her life and she saved mine."  
  
"I know, I know," Sam replied. "I'm OK with this, really."  
  
Daniel stared at her in surprise. "You know what?" he said. "You're right. You are OK with it. Jack acts all weird, but you act like it's normal. I like that, I was just wondering… why?"  
  
"Don't forget Jolinar," Sam reminded him gently. "And then there's Selmak and my dad. I've got used to the idea."  
  
"Yeah," Daniel agreed. "I guess you have."  
  
  
  
Zelnar was deep in thought. She would be eternally grateful, she knew, to Daniel for what he'd done. She had taken him over entirely against his wishes, and what's more, through the back of his neck. But what had he done? He'd saved her life. Zelnar knew no other human quite so forgiving. But Zelnar had known, from the first second she'd been in him, that her host was unusual. Listening to what Selmak had said, she was astounded and amazed.  
  
But Zelnar knew what she could do. Day by day, she talked to Daniel, soothed his nightmares, lightened his troubles by day and by night. And slowly, little by little, she was making her way into that part of Daniel's mind he kept hidden from view. Zelnar knew what could destroy a human from within, and she wasn't letting that happen. Daniel had saved her life; now she was saving his.  
  
For the first time in his life, Daniel wasn't alone.  
  
  
  
  
  
"All right, SG-1, move out!" yelled Jack as the Stargate activated. But looking round the Gate room, he could only see three team members including himself.  
  
"Oh, I'm gonna kill him!" Jack exclaimed. "Carter, where's Daniel/Zelnar?"  
  
"Just coming, sir," she answered happily, watching her commanding officer storm off to the door to try and find their errant archaeologist.  
  
"For what reason are you smiling, Major Carter?" Teal'C inquired, formal as always.  
  
"At what the colonel said," said Sam.  
  
"I fear I do not understand," Teal'C informed her.  
  
"He said 'Daniel/Zelnar,'" Sam said gleefully. "He said 'Daniel/Zelnar' like it was… normal!"  
  
By the look of it, Teal'C still didn't understand, but at that moment Jack appeared with Daniel/Zelnar in tow. The team's leader motioned towards the shimmering surface of the wormhole. "People, let's go! Just think, there's rocks and soil samples and alien baddies waiting for us!"  
  
Up in the control room, the general watched his primary team go through the Stargate. One by one, they disappeared in a flurry of disintegrating molecules, and he heard the whoosh as the Stargate closed.  
  
General Hammond turned, with a sigh, back to his paperwork. It was SG-1, of course, seeing as the team were as accident-prone as they were, they also left the biggest paper trail of any of the teams. He ran through their names with a pen… and paused. Looking at the name of the civilian member, he decided that a change should be made. Carefully, he added a forward slash, and then the name of the renegade Tok'ra who had changed SG-1 forever, probably for the better. Satisfied, the general read through the names once again.  
  
Colonel Jack O'Neill, Major Samantha Carter, Teal'C, and… Daniel Jackson/Zelnar. 


	2. Snow and Promises - how it ended

1 December 25th  
  
"Merry Christmas, everyone!" Jack O'Neill was in a good mood for a change. Of course, he hadn't given up on being sarcastic. But when the SGC held a party, they really held a party, and Jack hadn't given up on the idea of spiking the punch.  
  
Sam and Daniel were waiting in a corner, giggling slightly. Sam was only a little tipsy, and Daniel's blending meant that he was now physically incapable of getting drunk, but the room was full of laughter and Christmas decorations and people enjoying themselves, so the scientist duo were happily spying on their commanding officer hovering near the punch, with 'a bottle and a guilty look' as Daniel had succinctly put it. "It's not that I have anything against him spiking the punch," the archaeologist remarked in passing, "but it's just I don't want him to think we don't know he's spiked it."  
  
Suddenly, Daniel's eyes flashed gold. "I do not understand," said Zelnar plaintively. Sam smiled to herself. Zelnar was a centuries-old renegade Tok'ra fugitive, but she bore remarkable similarities to her gentle, young archaeologist host. They both made use of that same puppy-dog-eyes look when they wanted something, or didn't understand something.  
  
"What don't you understand, Zelnar?" asked Sam of the Tok'ra, whose eyes were fading back to blue again.  
  
"What is 'punch?' And how does one go about spiking it?"  
  
"It's a kind of drink," Sam said patiently. "It's traditional at parties like this."  
  
"Christmas? Midwinter Tau'ri revels?"  
  
"Midwinter Tau'ri revels…yes," Sam said, trying not to laugh. "Spiking it means adding alcohol to it. Too much alcohol makes non-blended humans a little…"  
  
"Inebriated?"  
  
"Yes! Inebriated!" Sam exclaimed, and looked up to see Daniel in control, laughing softly. "Inebriated!" he exclaimed. "I've been trying to explain that one to her for months."  
  
"Oh, look!" Sam said. "Here he comes."  
  
They watched in silence as Jack O'Neill advanced slowly towards the punch bowl, glancing around furtively as he did so. He carefully removed the cap from the bottle he was carrying, and tipped it up. However, he was suddenly startled by a sound that had everyone in the room groaning.  
  
"Unscheduled Gate activation! Incoming traveller!"  
  
"Ah, crap!" Jack watched in bemusement as his hand jerked, and a lot more of the clear liquid fell into the punch bowl than he'd intended. But there was no-one to see. Most people, including Sam and Daniel/Zelnar, had set off for the control room and were even now gazing at the Stargate, waiting for whatever might be about to come out of it.  
  
"Do we have a signal?" asked the general anxiously.  
  
"How can we?" objected Sam. "There are no units currently offworld."  
  
But a few seconds later, the computers accepted a GDO signal. "Who is it?" asked the general.  
  
"The Tok'ra!" said Sam suddenly.  
  
"Open the iris!" responded the general.  
  
Down in the Gate room, the huge metal iris swung out of the way. A few seconds later, a figure stepped out of the shimmering surface of the wormhole.  
  
"Dad!" Sam exclaimed in delight. Without waiting for anyone, she ran from the control room down into the Gate room.  
  
"Sam!" Jacob Carter/Selmak, Earth/Tok'ra liaison, stood on the Gate ramp and waited for his daughter to come running up at him. Daniel/Zelnar and the general followed at a more leisurely pace.  
  
After greetings and exclamations from both sides, the general got to the point.  
  
"So, Jacob, what brings you here?" he asked.  
  
"A Christmas party!" was Jacob's response.  
  
"That's it?" Sam asked. "You, and the oldest and wisest of the Tok'ra, are here among the Tau'ri for a Christmas party?"  
  
"Yes, Sam," Jacob said peaceably. "Lead me to it."  
  
"What, the punch?" muttered Daniel under his breath. Sam punched him gently and the SGC personnel returned to their party.  
  
"Although, Dad, he does have a point," confided Sam, whispering. "Don't touch the punch if you want to live!"  
  
"I will see your father takes your advice, Samantha," said the harsh voice of the Tok'ra Selmak. "I do not wish to have to deal with the aftermath of Jacob sampling the punch."  
  
"Boss me around, that's all she ever does," complained Jacob, back in control but conscious of Selmak's laughter inside his head. "Now, Sam, I know it's been a while since I was here for Christmas, but Selmak wanted to come. She said she wanted to get an insight into… what did she call it?"  
  
"Midwinter Tau'ri revels?" suggested Sam blandly.  
  
"Yes!" Jacob stared at her. "That was it! How did you…"  
  
Sam laughed and brushed the question off. "Don't ask, Dad."  
  
"However," Selmak's voice cut in once more, "I did not wish for Jacob to visit his daughter at Christmas at my behest without observing one particular Tau'ri tradition."  
  
"Which is her way of saying we've got you a present, Sam," said Jacob, smiling.  
  
"You have?" Sam was immediately intrigued. The Tok'ra led rather too busy lives to allow them any Christmas shopping time. But Jacob was carrying two carved wooden boxes, one rather larger than the other. Sam wondered how she hadn't noticed them until now.  
  
Gently, Jacob handed his daughter the smaller box, handling it almost reverently. There were others nearby who had been listening to the conversation, as Selmak's harsh voice and glowing eyes could never pass unnoticed, and so there were many people watching eagerly, trying to see what the Tok'ra had given Carter.  
  
Carefully, Sam prised open the box. Inside, she found something strange and beautiful. A piece of rock crystal, carved with many facets so it shone in the light. Sam delicately lifted it out, and felt something on her hand. A silver thread, so fine she hadn't seen it at first, ran through a tiny hole in the top of the crystal. With a flash of intuition, Sam realised what it was.  
  
"A necklace!" she exclaimed in delight. "Oh, Dad, thank you! It's beautiful."  
  
Jacob took the suspended crystal from her and fastened it around his daughter's neck. "Don't thank me, thank Selmak," he said. "It was her idea."  
  
"It may have been my idea, Samantha, but your father carried it out," interjected Selmak. "Your father showed great skill in carving the crystal."  
  
"In that case, I'm thanking both of you," Sam responded, looking down at her gift. In the light of the room, the thread was almost invisible. It looked like as if the crystal pendant were suspended at her neck by magic. Sam decided she loved the effect.  
  
"But what about the other box?" demanded Colonel O'Neill suddenly. Sam had almost forgotten about it, but typically of him, Jack hadn't. He glanced at it where it lay, on a convenient table. Bigger than the crystal's box, it appeared older, dustier, more worn. Sam looked at her father inquiringly. "Dad?"  
  
Jacob moved slowly over to the table, and deliberately, almost wearily, picked it up. "It's another gift," he said. "For someone else. Someone who might not be quite so happy to receive it."  
  
"Stop being mysterious, Jacob!" protested George Hammond. "What is it and who's it for?"  
  
Jacob/Selmak glanced around. Then, taking the box in his hands, he handed it reverently to its intended recipient with a sigh.  
  
All eyes turned to Daniel. He looked down at the box in his hands bewilderedly for a few moments, prompting Jack to say, "For cryin' out loud, Daniel, open it, put us out our misery!"  
  
Daniel opened it with the customary care with which he handled any artefact. When he saw what was inside, however, he considered for a brief moment whether it would be a good idea to just close Pandora's Box and hand it safely back to Jacob in the hope of never seeing it again.  
  
Daniel! Zelnar was a little impatient with her host. Daniel, why does it frighten you so much?  
  
I never… I never thought of this, that's why, Zelnar! It's all right for you, I'm sure you've done this for millennia. But it's different for me.  
  
"Oh, for crying out loud, what the hell is it?" Jack demanded in a dead silence. Slowly, Daniel placed the box on the floor. But before he did that, he drew out the Goa'uld ribbon device from it and held the shining metal links loosely in two hands.  
  
"Oh…" Sam breathed.  
  
"Jacob!" the general exclaimed. "You're giving Dr. Jackson a ribbon device?"  
  
Selmak cut in. "The Tok'ra High Council feel that Daniel/Zelnar should have it. As a blended human, Daniel has a right to it."  
  
"A right to it?" Jack repeated, and shrugged. "Sounds good to me."  
  
"Jack!" Daniel swung round to face SG-1's leader, his blue eyes blazing with anger. "You think I can just take that… that thing… and use it?"  
  
"Why the hell not, Daniel? Carter could." Jack pointed lazily at the astrophysicist, but a second later, he bitterly regretted his casual response. Hurt showing deeply in his eyes, Daniel had turned away from him, walking quickly away, head down. Sam paused a second, then hurried after him, knowing herself to be the only one who could truly understand.  
  
"Daniel!"  
  
Daniel turned. He had been trying to get as far away as he could, from Selmak, from Jack, and most of all, from the horrific shining weapon. Inexplicably, he had felt himself drawn to the control room, to the observation window where he could look out at the Stargate.  
  
"Sam." Daniel smiled wryly at her, pushing his long hair out of his eyes, a simple gesture that told Sam he felt better for her company. The few night shift technicians in the control room looked in surprise at the SG-1 scientists, but neither of them noticed. Instead, Sam drew two chairs together, pushed her friend into one and seated herself in the other. "There," she said. "Talk to me."  
  
"It's a Goa'uld ribbon weapon, Sam!" Daniel said softly and bitterly. "They think I can use it."  
  
"You can, Daniel," Sam said gently. "I can too, in a way. But you should have perfect, flawless control of it."  
  
"I'll be like the Goa'uld!" Daniel said. "I'm like the Goa'uld, Sam… I have the same power… my eyes glow… I have an entry scar…"  
  
"Daniel." Sam's voice was low and commanding. "You are not like the Goa'uld. You have the power of the Tok'ra."  
  
"You know what it's like, don't you?" said Daniel desperately. "You know."  
  
"I know. But Daniel, I killed Seth. If I can do it, you can do it. And you should do it better than me."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because I'm like Kendra… an ex-host who has had to learn to control the power alone. You have Zelnar to teach you," Sam said gently. Her memories of Jolinar were confusing enough for her to know all about the conflicts raging in Daniel's mind.  
  
She is right, said a small voice inside Daniel's mind.  
  
Thank you, Zelnar! Daniel responded. You've done this for thousands of years, it's all right for you.  
  
That is not true. I cannot use Goa'uld technology alone. I need the power of another mind alongside me.  
  
Another mind?  
  
My host. I need you, young as you are, to balance the power.  
  
Young? I'm young?  
  
Daniel, I have said so many times, you are a child. In truth, you are too young to be a host. But that was not an issue at the time of the blending.  
  
So? What should we do?  
  
Return with Samantha, Daniel, and take the ribbon weapon. You will see the power within.  
  
Sam had seen the blank look come into Daniel's eyes, and immediately guessed at the cause. When awareness returned to her friend's expression, she asked, "Talking to Zelnar?"  
  
Daniel smiled and nodded. "She thinks this is a good idea. Can't think why."  
  
Sam grinned at the irreverent sarcasm, and gently led Daniel back to the SGC Christmas party. Jacob was at the door waiting for them. He had been going to go after them when he saw them leave, but Selmak had stopped him. She had guessed the pair would return of their own accord, and Jacob's only response had been to mutter, "You're the oldest and wisest," under his breath, amusing Selmak greatly.  
  
"Daniel," said Jacob seriously on sight of the archaeologist. "If you don't want this, it's all right. You can lock it away and never think about it again, no questions asked."  
  
Daniel's head dropped, and lifted again. His eyes glowed gold briefly, and Zelnar spoke. "Selmak."  
  
"I am here," responded Selmak.  
  
"My host has agreed to accept the ribbon weapon as a gift. He understands what I have to tell him."  
  
"Daniel is too young to be a host, Zelnar," said Selmak thoughtfully. "You know this. You have already grievously wronged this host, and yet he chose to forgive and accept you. Be aware of how much you owe him, and do not go against his wishes."  
  
"He has agreed of his own free will!" hissed Zelnar angrily.  
  
"I did not say he has not. I am reminding you, Zelnar, be aware of how indebted you are to your host. I know Daniel trusts you. I trust his judgement, and yet…"  
  
Jack was watching this scene in bemusement. A person could be excused for thinking the drama being enacted before them was an old general in the military having an impassioned argument with a young civilian archaeologist. Only a person with specialised knowledge could know that this was a clash between two members of an ancient and proud race, one the leader of her people and the other a renegade runaway.  
  
Selmak's eyes flashed. "Zelnar! Are you taking any heed of what I am saying?"  
  
Surprising all the listeners, Daniel answered in his own soft voice. "She's not happy with you, Selmak," he said. "But she told you the truth. I'm ready for this."  
  
Jacob/Selmak silently moved across to the table where the box had been placed. He lifted the weapon carefully out of it and handed it to Daniel without a word. Around them people had forgotten they were at a party, and were watching intently. After all, this was SG-1. It was well known how they couldn't even go on downtime or get promoted without being beamed up by the Asgard, so a party couldn't go by without something extraordinary happening, now could it?  
  
Daniel/Zelnar wrapped the weapon around his hand with care, pushing his long fingers into it delicately. Then, he took a deep breath and lifted it.  
  
Now, Daniel!  
  
Zelnar?  
  
You can do it. Harness the power within!  
  
Zelnar was the first to feel it. A power, the power of a human mind, immense, all encompassing, bubbling up and spreading and showing in Daniel's eyes, a glowing, shining light.  
  
"Whoa!" Jack took a guilty step back. He watched his friend's eyes glow, first blue, then deepening into the customary gold and amber, but they didn't fade. With a sudden rush of power, the crystal in the ribbon weapon glowed brightly. Another second passed, and then the table Daniel was standing in front of was lifted by a massive force and thrown with an almighty crash against the opposite wall.  
  
Zelnar?  
  
Daniel! You see the power you possess?  
  
We possess. Both of us. Not just me and not just you.  
  
Your wisdom is greater than your years.  
  
You've said that before.  
  
And it was no less true then. You are a strange and wonderful human, Daniel. Too young, too wise.  
  
Thank you, Zelnar.  
  
"Daniel? Daniel!" Jack called, wondering if the archaeologist could hear him at all. But Daniel was listening. "I'm here, Jack," he said mildly.  
  
"Daniel, you did it," Sam said softly. "You did it."  
  
"Always knew you could," cut in Jack, pleased.  
  
"Congratulations, Daniel." Daniel looked up into Selmak's amber eyes. "You are a true Tok'ra host."  
  
"I am?" Daniel said, bewildered. He looked down at the shining metal that had taken the shape of his hand and smiled. Suddenly, he felt all of his strength leaving his body and mind, and he crumpled. Jack caught him just in time. "Daniel!" he exclaimed. "What the hell…"  
  
"It is to be expected," said Selmak gently. "Daniel and Zelnar have pushed body and mind as far as they can go. There will be repercussions."  
  
"But he'll be all right?" said Jack worriedly. Suddenly Daniel's body felt too light in his arms, too still and quiet.  
  
Gently, Sam removed the ribbon device from Daniel's hands. It gleamed dully in the light as she replaced it in its box.  
  
  
  
2 January 2nd - a week later  
  
"Come in, Colonel O'Neill." The general called Jack into his office and motioned him to sit down.  
  
"You wanted to see me, sir?" Jack asked. He was wondering inwardly what transgressions he might have committed over Christmas that the general wanted to see him about.  
  
But the general was smiling. "It's nothing serious, Colonel," he said. "I wanted to welcome you back, and tell you that Dr. Frasier wants you to see her in the infirmary right away."  
  
"Thank you, general." Jack took his leave, shaking his head. Any kind of visit to the SGC resident doctor was a bad idea, in his opinion. He wondered what she'd got for Christmas, and prayed it wasn't anything sharp or pointy.  
  
But Janet surprised Jack when she came to meet him at the door to the infirmary. "Colonel O'Neill," she called. "Are the Tok'ra coming today?"  
  
"I guess so," Jack replied thoughtfully. "Carter's looking forward to seeing her dad again today. He left again after the party, you know."  
  
"I know," Janet replied. "I want you to back me up on this, Colonel. They can't make Daniel use the hand device again."  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"It's a tremendous pressure on Daniel, can't you see that, Colonel?" Janet exclaimed. "It's having the same effect on him as complete and utter nervous exhaustion. I'm not saying he can't ever use it again, but…"  
  
Jack nodded. He understood. Although he hadn't admitted it, it had scared him badly when Daniel collapsed in his arms at the Christmas party. Of course, Daniel being Daniel, he had soon opened his eyes and demanded back his glasses, but Janet had promptly taken him into her care. She had said this at the time… Daniel was exhausted, physically and mentally, by the power the weapon device had taken from him.  
  
But beyond that, there was nothing actually wrong with Daniel/Zelnar, and so he, the rest of SG-1, Janet, Cassie, Catherine and Ernest had spent Christmas together.  
  
Since then, no-one had done very much at all. Teal'C had spent a few days absolutely fascinated by the phenomenon known as Tau'ri Christmas television, and also developed an interest in astronomy, helped along by Jack, who had been spending time with his telescope, as well as thinking about going fishing, but never actually getting around to it. Sam had fretted about her decreasing supply of naquadah, eaten ice-cream and painted her toe-nails. Daniel had shown Zelnar and Teal'C a few more Tau'ri traditions, and had spent most of the rest of the holidays curled up with his books, "not working, just reading" as he was so exhausted after the ribbon weapon that he had developed a habit of falling asleep mid- conversation.  
  
Now, they were all back. SG-1 were going on missions without Daniel for a few more weeks yet, until Janet declared him fit again, but he wasn't sitting doing nothing. He preferred to stay at Cheyenne Mountain and keep out of Janet's way.  
  
"Come to think of it, where is Daniel?" Jack asked suddenly. He hadn't seen his pet archaeologist for a few days now. He had figured that his friend would be here when SG-1 went on their next mission, even though he wasn't coming himself. But there were still six hours to go before they had to ship out, Jack told himself. There was plenty of time. Daniel would be here.  
  
But in the meantime, there would be no harm in going to look for him, now would there? Someone had to make sure the kid ate and slept, after all…  
  
Janet guessed what SG-1's team leader was thinking. "Go and find him, Colonel," she said. "Tell him I've told you to keep and eye on him!"  
  
Jack grinned and departed. No-one had to tell him twice.  
  
  
  
3 Some hours before  
  
It was cold. It was very cold. Daniel blew on his hands and rubbed them together to try and warm them. It didn't really work, but Daniel didn't care very much. He was standing as close to the top of the world as he could go, and so he wasn't worried about the fact his hands were cold.  
  
Daniel was being followed.  
  
To be more specific, Daniel was still on Cheyenne Mountain, but he was twenty-eight levels above Stargate Command. He was high above, on the top side of the mountain, looking down at the snow-covered landscape. He could see the small town of Colorado Springs far below, looking like a toy town.  
  
Daniel was being followed.  
  
He didn't know why exactly he had come here in the snow, except perhaps he was bored of staying in with his books for so long. For someone who had galactic exploration in his job description, he wasn't easily bored. But he had had Sam, Janet and even Jack fussing over him since Christmas now, and he thought perhaps it might be a good idea to get away, if only for an hour or so, to remind himself he could still manage alone. With Zelnar, of course. She had been quiet on the way up here, only speaking to exclaim at the view, just like all the first-time human visitors up here.  
  
Daniel was being followed.  
  
Beside the now snowy path that led up here, there was a brief scuffling in the bushes. Daniel didn't notice it. Zelnar did, her fugitive instincts coming into play, but she didn't attach any importance to the movement. Neither of them, Tok'ra or host, were prepared when two tough and strapping Marines emerged from the bushes. They had strict instructions. One of them took a filled syringe from his pocket and emptied it into Daniel's arm before the archaeologist could react.  
  
After a few minutes, silence returned to the top of Cheyenne Mountain. It had begun to snow again, filling in the footprints with white drifts of fresh snow.  
  
  
  
4 Later  
  
Jack was not in a good mood. He hated it when things didn't go to plan, and this was one of those times. Firstly, he'd expected to find Daniel. Years spent in the prone-to-wandering-off archaeologist's company had taught him where to look. And in any case, Daniel didn't wander off nearly so much since that time he had walked off on an alien planet in the middle of a war, and so given the dying Zelnar the chance of a new host.  
  
But, all right, Jack could accept that. So Daniel had found a new hiding place. He could deal with that. But he knew that his friend should be here to see them off, bid them goodbye, come up with some smart remark that only Carter understood, as they moved on out through the Gate on SG-1's next mission. So what if Daniel himself wasn't coming? It wasn't like him to stay away.  
  
Jack was still wondering about it as they left Earth through the Stargate. The wormhole closed; people at the SGC sighed as they got back into the swing of things after their long Christmas break. Things were normal, at least, as normal as they ever were around here.  
  
But right at that moment, in an interdimensional conduit, being thrown along a silver pathway to the stars, Jack O'Neill still only had one thought in his mind.  
  
Where was Daniel?  
  
It was cold. It was… snow. Dimly, Daniel could remember the snow, and he knew that he must have been dragged through it for it to have got so thoroughly into his mouth and nose and ears. It was even in his eyes and had begun to melt in his overlong hair, making him shiver and tremble with cold. Daniel wondered why it was so dark, and why he was rocking back and forth. With one of those flashes of intuition he was famous for, he realised he was being carried. There was something soft wrapped round his eyes, blocking out any light. He could faintly remember being stabbed with a long needle, and knew it to be the reason he was being carried in the first place. He was more than a little light-headed, almost disembodied, and his head had filled with pain. Zelnar was remaining silent in his mind, withdrawing from pain and cold, and she gave her young host all she had to offer to ease it.  
  
Daniel… sleep…  
  
Zelnar? What happened?  
  
I do not know. You were given a drug to render you unconscious.  
  
I thought drugs didn't work on Tok'ra blended humans?  
  
It was an excessive dose. Were you not a host, it would have been enough to kill you. Whoever holds us captive knows full well who you are.  
  
Captive? I've been kidnapped? Why?  
  
I do not know. Sleep, Daniel. I can keep you sleeping and free from cold and pain for a few hours, and I will take control if any attempt is made to hurt you. Do you understand?  
  
Yes.  
  
Daniel's eyes closed under the soft covering. He was asleep in seconds, not deeply asleep but kept lightly slumbering by Zelnar's influence.  
  
"I think he's… it's awake."  
  
"What?"  
  
The Marine shifted the weight he was carrying slightly, and looked towards his companion. "What do I do?"  
  
The aforesaid companion laughed. "Nothing! We've got our orders and that's all we need to think about."  
  
His friend, however, was not so easily silenced. "I don't get it," he complained. "What do they do in that place? Why's it need-to-know only? And what the hell was this all about?"  
  
"I don't know and I don't care," said the other firmly. "We've got it, now we take it where it's supposed to go and forget we ever saw it. Got it?"  
  
"I guess. But I gotta know something first."  
  
His friend sighed. "What?"  
  
"This guy's not an alien, is he? It's just a cover, calling him an alien, right?"  
  
"Not him, it, damnit! It's an alien. Got loose from somewhere or other. Now we take it back to where it's meant to go."  
  
"But…"  
  
"Shut up!"  
  
He shut up. It seemed the easiest thing to do. He shivered a little as one of Daniel's outstretched hands brushed one of his, so cold and unresisting the hapless Marine couldn't help placing two fingers on his wrist. He could feel a pulse, weak but steady, and he relaxed a little. An alien he could cope with, but carrying an alien corpse… However, it seemed this alien was outwardly very like a human, he thought to himself. Daniel/Zelnar lay in his arms, eyes closed, looking like death with snowflakes melting off Daniel's long, lowered lashes. It continued to snow.  
  
A short time later, they arrived at their destination and carried out their orders.  
  
"You did good. Dismissed!"  
  
"Yes, sir!" The two Marines went on their way, and true to form, began to forget their mission immediately. That left an Air Force Colonel standing in a room at Area 51 with a bundle at his feet.  
  
Maybourne leaned forward and pulled the covering off Daniel/Zelnar's eyes. He smiled a little at the sight of his prize, then picked up a phone on a table at his elbow.  
  
"Hello? Yes, this is Colonel Maybourne. We've got the Goa'uld."  
  
  
  
5 Three days later  
  
"And we're back!" SG-1 exited the Stargate, looking tired and dirty but perfectly cheerful. They tramped down the ramp, to be met by the general at the foot of it.  
  
"It was boring," Jack said. "There were trees. Carter got naquadah, Teal'C got in some target practice, I got insect bites, we all got bored. Did I mention there were trees?"  
  
"Report to the infirmary," the general said absently, almost as if he hadn't heard what the team leader had said. But as they trudged wearily out of the Gate room, the general seemed to come to himself and call them back. "Colonel O'Neill?"  
  
"Yes, sir?"  
  
"When you've finished in the infirmary, bring your team to the briefing room immediately." The general made this statement gravely, then left the Gate room abruptly. He wished he didn't have to tell his primary team this, but he knew he must.  
  
Jack, Sam and Teal'C went to the infirmary, all wondering what had happened in their absence. Janet greeted them soberly, too soberly, Sam noticed. Why were people treading on eggshells? What had happened?  
  
There was silence in the briefing room when the general entered. SG-1 looked at him expectantly, and the general sighed. "SG-1," he said gravely, "Daniel Jackson has disappeared."  
  
"What?" Jack and Sam said simultaneously.  
  
"Dr. Frasier tried to contact him a few hours after you left, unsuccessfully. No-one has seen or heard from him in three days."  
  
"What?" Jack repeated, feeling like an idiot for doing so, but he really didn't think there was anything else he could say. He remembered his thoughts as SG-1 had departed, and mentally kicked himself.  
  
"What's happened? Where could he possibly be?" Sam Carter demanded, standing up.  
  
"We don't know," General Hammond responded. "We've done everything we can think of. But you must understand that we can't afford to raise the local authorities. If any attention is called to the fact Dr. Jackson is a host, it would be a major breach of security for this programme."  
  
"That's not our only problem."  
  
They all turned to see Janet standing in the doorway. "Daniel's not in the best of health right now," she said gravely. "In fact, unless Zelnar has pulled off a miracle, I think Daniel will be close to collapse by now."  
  
"But was the health of Daniel Jackson not improving, Dr. Frasier?" Teal'C asked.  
  
"Yes, Teal'C, it was, but he's very tired and easily exhausted still. Without proper care, I don't know what might happen."  
  
"With all due respect, sir, this is Daniel we're talking about!" Jack exclaimed. "He's not just some 'breach of security!'"  
  
"Unfortunately, Colonel, no matter how we might wish otherwise, that is exactly what he is. But rest assured, we will not rest until he is found."  
  
"What can we do to help?" Sam asked.  
  
"At present, Major, we are already doing everything possible," the general replied. "But I would like you all to think back… did he say anything to you at all that might indicate where he is now? Anything you remember?"  
  
Sam thought back, and said hesitantly, "I think I was the last person to see him. He said he was going for a walk… I think."  
  
"You think?" repeated the general.  
  
"Yeah… I guess. He said he was fed up of staying inside all the time… he said he'd meet me at Cheyenne Mountain later…"  
  
"And did he?"  
  
"Well… no. I thought he meant he'd be here when we shipped out, but…"  
  
"He wasn't," Jack finished. "I thought he'd be here as well."  
  
"You both thought this?" said General Hammond, looking for clarification. "But neither of you mentioned it?"  
  
Jack and Sam stayed silent. The general let them stew in their own guilt for a few seconds, feeling that would be more effective as a reprimand and warning than anything hr could himself could say, and went on: "So we've established Dr. Jackson was last seen by Major Carter three days ago. Do we know where he went that morning?"  
  
"I'm guessing somewhere near here," Sam offered. "He did say he would meet me here."  
  
Sam's words suddenly triggered a memory in Jack's mind. He remembered what he had been thinking to himself as he took that last step into the silvery wormhole. So Daniel's found a new hiding place…  
  
Jack had always known about his friend's tendency to… well, for lack of a better word, to hide. Having spent so much of his life alone, Daniel had long ago reached the stage where he needed solitude to collect his thoughts. Jack had learned to recognise that hunted look in Daniel's blue eyes that said leave me alone, go away, and left him alone, went away and waited for the archaeologist to emerge from wherever he was hiding and return to his daily life.  
  
Jack didn't like it. He didn't like the fact the kid needed loneliness to carry on, and of course, he worried about Daniel, on Earth as he did everywhere else. After the advent of Zelnar, however, he worried less. He trusted the Tok'ra fugitive to take care of her young host, no matter how much the aforementioned Tok'ra irritated him when she was actually present. But Jack had always made certain of one thing. He always made sure he knew where it was Daniel went. In other words, where his hiding place was.  
  
"General? Sir?"  
  
"Yes, Colonel O'Neill?"  
  
"I know this place where Daniel goes sometimes…"  
  
When SG-1 reached the top of Cheyenne Mountain, it had begun to snow again, with big, soft flakes drifting down and obscuring everything.  
  
"It's no use," Sam said, rubbing her hands together and shivering. "Even if he was here…"  
  
"He was here," Jack interrupted firmly. "He was here."  
  
"All right, say he was," Sam persisted. "He isn't here now. And even if he is here, we've got no chance of finding him in this snow, so I suggest we…"  
  
"Carter!"  
  
"Sorry, sir."  
  
Jack was shaking his head in disbelief at his second-in-command, but he knew that inside she must feel as he did. Guilty and worried and let's face it, scared. Jack was scared out of his mind that perhaps… they wouldn't find him. Jack tried wildly to stifle that thought, and happily for him, he was startled just then by a buzzing sound. He grabbed hold of his radio and held it up.  
  
"SG-1? This is General Hammond. Do you read?"  
  
"Yes, sir!" Jack exclaimed.  
  
"We've ascertained the whereabouts of Dr. Jackson."  
  
Jack looked up, wild-eyed, at Sam and Teal'C. "They've found him!" he shouted. "They've found him!"  
  
General Hammond was there waiting for SG-1 when they staggered onto level 28, cold and dripping wet with snow. In his hand he held a piece of paper with a few scrawled handwritten words on it. When the general had attempted to call in a few markers, he hadn't expected any success. It was a surprise he had found out anything at all, but he had never in his wildest nightmares expected anything like this.  
  
"Sir?" The colonel was looking at him, on tenterhooks.  
  
"Colonel, Dr. Jackson has been taken to Area 51 by the NID. Maybourne has him as we speak."  
  
It was true. Daniel's first thought upon seeing the face of his captor was oh, crap, not you, a thought that made Zelnar metaphorically sit up and take notice.  
  
Who is this? she asked.  
  
Maybourne. He's… not someone I want to see.  
  
Why?  
  
He's tried to take Teal'C away before, and when we had the Tollans here the first time, he tried to lock them up and take their knowledge… I helped them escape to the Nox and he tried to shoot me… He's always been after alien technology and power…Oh, my God.  
  
What?  
  
He wants you!  
  
I do not understand.  
  
He's always wanted a Goa'uld for study at Area 51… he's going to try and take you for experimenting on!  
  
I am not a Goa'uld!  
  
Biologically, you are. And he wants to take you from me!  
  
He cannot do so! Removing me by force would kill both myself and my host.  
  
He doesn't care!  
  
"Daniel Jackson." The voice halted the internal dialogue going on within Daniel's head, and made him look at Maybourne and his surroundings properly for the first time. He had no doubt that he was inside Area 51. He lay on the cold hard floor of a clinical white room, at the feet of Maybourne. Daniel couldn't move or speak, but his eyes were fixed on Maybourne's, telling the NID colonel that the archaeologist was quite aware of what was going on around him.  
  
Maybourne smiled. He had seldom been as angry as when he saw a naive, civilian archaeologist happily allow the Tollans, the only means Earth had to advanced technology, escape to another world with the help of the Nox girl Lya. But he had let that incident go. Later on, SG-1 had returned to Chulak to try and obtain a larval Goa'uld for study, but typically of them, they had returned empty handed.  
  
And then, they had heard the news. One of the SGC personnel had become a Goa'uld host. An opportunity had come at last! But that time, Maybourne himself had had doubts. The Goa'uld seemed remarkably passive, allowing its host to speak most of the time. Was it really worth the effort in obtaining it?  
  
Things had rested like that for some time, but then came Christmas, and Maybourne learnt of the gift given to the host by Jacob Carter/Selmak, the Tok'ra liaison. Despite the fact it appeared so weak, it would seem that the Goa'uld had all the power of its relatives. And when Maybourne discovered the host was none other than Daniel Jackson… well, there was a bonus if anything was.  
  
"Do you know where you are?" Maybourne asked silkily, crouching down to be at eye level with Daniel/Zelnar.  
  
"Area 51, I guess," Daniel said, so quietly Maybourne had to lean forwards to hear.  
  
"You guess right. Do you know why you're here?" Maybourne went on, enjoying the fact he had the infuriating civilian under control at last.  
  
"You… you want a Goa'uld for study. You want to take Zelnar."  
  
"You're on first name terms with it? I see. Of course, you understand how you'll be better off without a Goa'uld inside your head. Or are you more stubborn than I thought, Dr. Jackson?"  
  
"She's not a Goa'uld, she's a Tok'ra," whispered Daniel.  
  
Maybourne didn't seem to have heard, staring into space for a few seconds. Standing up, he called: "Airman!"  
  
A guard who had been just outside the door entered the room, and looked enquiringly at Maybourne. "Sir?"  
  
"Help me."  
  
Between them, they lifted Daniel/Zelnar, who had no strength to resist, and placed him on the table. Maybourne dismissed the man curtly and once he had gone, turned his attention back to the archaeologist. He reached out with one hand and gently pushed Daniel's long hair out of the way. Daniel felt his long fingers delicately touch his neck, and flinched.  
  
Maybourne smiled; he knew exactly what he was doing. "A Tok'ra," he said softly. "A Tok'ra who has given you an entry scar. I understand."  
  
"She's a Tok'ra!" Daniel insisted. "She took me as a host as a last resort!"  
  
"A host?" Maybourne repeated. "A host. That's exactly what you are, Dr. Jackson. You are a Goa'uld host. A great pity, of course. But I'm sure you'd agree that some good has to come out of the whole sorry affair? We can study the Goa'uld within you, Dr. Jackson; we can learn to defend against it, we can ensure no more Goa'ulds can ever harm humans."  
  
"Zelnar has never harmed anyone!" Daniel replied. "She has rights as well."  
  
"And that's where you're wrong. It has no rights… you have no rights. It isn't human… it's alien. And you… you're nothing but an alien host."  
  
Suddenly, Zelnar felt her anger rise. Seizing control of her host, eyes flashing gold and amber, she faced her antagonist without fear. "You speak such lies!" she hissed. "My host will be killed if you take me from him!"  
  
Maybourne had to admit he didn't like the idea of the glowing eyes, but he didn't show it. "And you are?" he said smoothly.  
  
"I am Zelnar. You know this, Tau'ri! You must know. You know what you do to be wrong. It is not I who am evil, but you!"  
  
"Charmed, I'm sure," Maybourne responded, but inwardly, he was kicking himself for not putting restraints on the Goa'uld. It had been an oversight, but Daniel/Zelnar was still exhausted and the mistake could easily be put right. He didn't use handcuffs to restrain the Goa'uld, but rather soft cotton ropes. Maybourne didn't want to harm Daniel/Zelnar in any way. He wanted to be sure he would be alive and healthy enough for study for a long, long time. Daniel didn't resist at all. Despite Zelnar's attempts to neutralise it, the drug still flowed through his veins, and lulled him into sleep once more. Maybourne was quick to realise what had happened. Making sure the bonds round Daniel's wrists and ankles were tight, he left the room, taking care to lock the door behind him. Daniel slept on, the covering on his head reminding him subconsciously of the woollen cloak he had slept in on Abydos. Zelnar encouraged and heightened the association, hoping to keep Daniel safe inside his own mind for just a few hours. She herself was less content. Her love for her young host made her hate Maybourne with a deadly hatred. Silently, she brooded, whilst Daniel slept.  
  
SG-1 were dripping all over the floor, staring at General Hammond in absolute and utter astonishment, and in the case of Jack, in anger. "Maybourne!" he growled. "What the hell…"  
  
"Daniel is a host," Sam said wearily. "They've taken him for studying, haven't they?"  
  
"Experimenting on, more like!" snapped Jack. "Sir, we have to get him back!"  
  
"We haven't the jurisdiction, Colonel," said the general regretfully. "I only know this unofficially. Officially, we've got our hands tied."  
  
There was a very serious pause.  
  
"SG-1," said the general, breaking it, "go and get yourselves cleaned up. We'll find a way to get Daniel Jackson back, don't worry."  
  
Slowly, SG-1 trudged out of the room. "'Don't worry,' he says," muttered Jack under his breath as they did so. "What's there to worry about? Maybourne could be torturing him, he could have killed him…"  
  
"Sir, please!" said Sam sharply.  
  
Jack glanced at her. "Sorry," he said quickly. "I just…"  
  
"I know," she said. "I know."  
  
"What have you done to yourselves now?" said a voice suddenly. Janet was standing in the doorway to the infirmary, watching them.  
  
"Put the needle down, doctor," Jack told her. "We've got nothing wrong with us. We're just a little bit wet."  
  
"You are also dripping all over my clean floor, Colonel," Janet said sternly. "Go and change, and find yourself a towel while you're at it!"  
  
SG-1 complied. It seemed the easiest thing to do.  
  
  
  
6 Three weeks later  
  
A cold, dark, silent room. Perhaps not completely silent, for there were sounds, but as there was no-one to hear, it could have been said to be silent. The only sounds were the quiet humming of computers and machinery, and quieter still, the sound of someone crying softly in the dark.  
  
Daniel, hush! Someone will hear.  
  
There's no-one.  
  
You do not know that.  
  
It doesn't matter anyway. What more can they do to me, Zelnar? What else can they… can they… possibly…  
  
Hush, child! Do not think such things!  
  
I can't help myself, Zelnar. I'm tired… I'm tired of it all…  
  
Oh, I know, child. I only wish I could save you from this.  
  
Daniel's eyes closed. Tears still gleamed on his lashes, but he didn't make a sound. He had heard movement from outside the door. After so long, the archaeologist had become hyper-sensitive to any kind of sound or movement, and he was quick to identify what was happening.  
  
The door opened, and one of the scientists came in, turning on one of the dimmest lights, so Daniel could just about make out what was going on. The scientist was carrying a syringe, and Daniel knew what that meant. He had come to expect this, every hour, on the hour.  
  
The scientist grabbed one of his hands, and stabbed the needle into Daniel's wrist. He paused a second, then gently drew out the plunger so the barrel filled with dark red fluid. Then, he left once more. He might have been whistling slightly, but Daniel couldn't be sure. He looked down at his hand, stained as it was with his own blood, and let out a deep, shuddering breath.  
  
Zelnar?  
  
Yes?  
  
Do you know what it is they want?  
  
I do not understand.  
  
At first I thought they wanted you. That's what Maybourne said. I thought they would try and extract you from me. But they haven't. They've done… other things…  
  
Other things. Yes. I have my own ideas about what they want. They have taken so much of your life blood, Daniel. I believe they want the power you have as a host.  
  
I don't understand.  
  
They brought you here after Selmak showed you the power you have over the Goa'uld ribbon device. The essence of that power is contained in your blood. I believe they have discovered this, and they are trying to use your blood as a method of allowing unblended humans to use Goa'uld technology.  
  
Is that possible?  
  
No. They will not succeed, no matter how much of your blood they take. And Daniel, they have taken too much.  
  
Zelnar! What do you mean?  
  
You are greatly weakened by the loss of it.  
  
Is that how they're keeping me like this?  
  
Yes. They cannot use drugs on you any longer; I have learned to neutralise anything they give you. So by taking your blood, they are keeping you weak. It will not kill you; I can keep you alive for as long as I remain within you.  
  
How long has it been?  
  
I am not entirely certain. I feel it must be three weeks, a month since the kidnapping. They have taken your blood many times a day since then. And if that were only all they have done…  
  
Daniel shuddered slightly; he had tried to block everything out, tried to hide in his own mind where Zelnar could keep him safe. But his blood wasn't all they wanted from him. It was simply a means of keeping him close to death, safe in the knowledge Zelnar wouldn't let him die. And while he was as close to death as he was, they could use him in any way they pleased, because, after all he wasn't even human… 'nothing but an alien host…'  
  
The host's body and mind were scarred with the experiments and horrors inflicted on him. Daniel was numb… every hour he watched them take the blood, and was amazed to see he still had enough life in him to keep the blood flowing. He slept through most of it now, as being woken every hour for so long had now become tantamount to sleep-deprivation. It could be any hour of the night or day… he had no way of knowing as he slipped in and out of consciousness.  
  
Zelnar had more strength than her host, and she observed everything that went on detachedly, from the back of his mind. She knew now there was only one way out… only one thing she could do to break the cycle. As Daniel slept, she planned. Taking care to hide everything of her plans from her beloved child host, she brooded.  
  
"I don't believe we're doing this," Sam said for the umpteenth time to a patient Janet.  
  
"Why not?" asked the doctor.  
  
"We're planning a search-and-rescue mission," Sam said irritably. "But not on a alien planet, we're doing it in Nevada. And we're not arming ourselves against the Goa'uld or even an Earth enemy, we're fighting against our own government."  
  
"Sam," said Janet, "you can't say we haven't tried every single alternative. We've gone through all the conventional channels, we've done everything short of this. Now do you want Daniel back or not?"  
  
"Of course I do," Sam replied quietly. After a pause, she added, "Janet?"  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"How do you think Daniel will be… you know, physically… when we find him?"  
  
Janet's eyes hardened. "I don't know, Sam," she replied guardedly. "It depends what exactly they've done to him. But Sam… you'd better prepare yourself."  
  
Sam nodded. Her eyes were half-closed, trying to betray no emotion as a good soldier should. She stood still for a few seconds, breathing deeply, and when Janet next looked up, she was gone.  
  
"Carter!" exclaimed Jack a short while later. "Are we all set? Teal'C?"  
  
"I am ready, O'Neill," replied Teal'C, his usual stoic self. Jack nodded briefly, and led his team up to the surface. There were only three of them. There could have been more, but both Sam and Jack felt that this was a personal mission, and could only be undertaken by themselves and themselves alone.  
  
The trio were flown out of Colorado, and soon alighted at a place called Nellis, Nevada, a place so secret it didn't appear on any map. They entered the base easily enough. The general had recycled the plan they had used whilst on the track of the missing touchstone, giving them a handful of documents to deliver, documents sensitive enough to warrant a 'two man team with Jaffa escort.'  
  
Jack didn't know what the plan was. Hell, he didn't even know if there was a plan. But he knew Hammond trusted him, and he knew the general would conveniently turn a blind eye to anything he was asked to, providing… providing they got Daniel back.  
  
Deep within the realms of Area 51, a young scientist yawned sleepily as he made his way down the long corridors. His name was Mackintosh, but he was known as Mack to all and sundry.  
  
Mack was a lot more tired than he would admit. He had been working on a project until all hours the night before, and he hadn't got any sleep since then. Mack was passionate about the work he was doing. A possible cure for Alzheimer's and dementia had been brought back by one of the SG teams some time before, and Mack knew how close he was to making a real breakthrough with it. Ideally, he would have liked to just stay in the lab for as long as it took. But unfortunately, Mack was only one of many military scientists here, and very young in the bargain. It wasn't that he minded being ordered around so much, but he did wish they would leave him alone sometimes. But no, here he was, at five o'clock in the morning, on an errand for a completely different department and research project. They said, "You're a doctor, you do it," so he was off taking a blood sample from some alien or other. He didn't understand how the Area 51 officials had kept the existence of aliens under wraps for so long, but it wasn't his place to question. He'd never actually seen any of the aliens at Area 51, but he knew they were there, in the same way as the fact he'd never been to Australia but he knew it was there.  
  
Come to think of it, it might not be such a bad thing to have to do, taking this blood sample, if he finally got to see one of the infamous aliens. Slightly perked up by this thought, Mack followed the directions he had been given, carrying a syringe in one hand. He'd always thought Area 51 worse than a maze, and he wasn't dissuaded of the idea by the amount of time it took for him to find the room he was bound for.  
  
Mack pushed the door open quietly and blinked to get his eyes accustomed to the relative darkness in the room. There was a table slash bed at the other side of the room. There was someone… or something… curled up upon it, hidden by a rough blanket. He made his way across confidently, and found the creature's outstretched hand was free of the blanket. Mack took it gently and stabbed the needle into its wrist. He pulled out the plunger and watched the barrel fill with the red fluid. Alien or no alien, Mack thought, it's still the same as us, to have red blood.  
  
After a minute, Mack was ready to go, but as he placed his hand on the door handle, he paused. What would it hurt?  
  
The young scientist strode back and whipped the blanket away from the alien's head. In shock, he found himself gazing at a human being like himself. Young, about his own age, with blonde and brown hair almost long enough to touch his shoulders, naked under the blanket, but human nonetheless. Mack stared in horror, and realised with a further shock that his eyes were open. Deep blue, hunted eyes… it made Mack shiver just to look at them.  
  
Daniel looked up at the scientist and simply withdrew, waiting for him to leave with his sample. There was a thought in his mind, just one thought, and he held onto it.  
  
Zelnar?  
  
Daniel?  
  
Let me die! You can leave me and take a new host, and survive… just please let me die now, please…  
  
Mack was already frozen to the spot in absolute revulsion at the evidence he could see of the horrific cruelty inflicted on this… human. But a second later, something happened that made him doubt whether he was human after all.  
  
Daniel's eyes flared white-gold, something they had not done in a long time. Zelnar had made a longstanding promise to her host that never would she take control of him without warning. During the time the Tok'ra and host had been in captivity, Zelnar mainly took control just to bear some of the burden alongside Daniel. Now, Zelnar was filled with cold, calculating rage… rage against every person who had taken part in imprisoning and torturing the host she loved. Firmly in control of Daniel's body, she sat up and faced Mack. "Tau'ri!" she snarled, in her harsh, disturbing voice.  
  
Mack had never heard the word before. He was standing stock still, tensed with fear, when he felt an iron grip around his neck.  
  
"Tau'ri," whispered Zelnar menacingly, "Tell me what I wish to know or you die!"  
  
"What… what do you want to know?" choked Mack helplessly in her grip.  
  
"Where is the one who calls himself Maybourne?" the Tok'ra demanded.  
  
"Colonel Maybourne?" whispered Mack. "He's somewhere here… I guess. I don't know! Please let me go!"  
  
Zelnar suddenly did just that, knocking the scientist dismissively to the floor. "Weak," she spat, falling back.  
  
Zelnar, what are you doing?  
  
I have waited long enough for this. I go to extract vengeance.  
  
No! We're… I'm dying, Zelnar! I can't do this! You can't do this!  
  
You wished me to let you die, child. If you die, I may live on. But those who have killed you will die with you!  
  
Zelnar, no… Jack…  
  
When Mack came to himself, he wondered whether the entire experience had been some kind of crazy hallucination. But when he sat up, he found a syringe by his feet. It was filled with blood, but clotting blood, as if he had lain here a long time. Standing up, Mack looked around the room. He was the only person in it. Mack brushed the dust off himself, and looked back around the room. The blanket was gone as well, he noticed. Walking out the door, Mack couldn't help but wonder…  
  
  
  
6.1 Fifteen minutes earlier  
  
"I really don't know," said Jack O'Neill pleasantly. "I can't think of anywhere she might have gone."  
  
The person he was speaking to, a low ranking captain, gritted his teeth in annoyance. He had been given the job of escorting the notorious SG-1 around the top secret facility at Area 51. However, five minutes into the tour, the team's second-in-command, Major Samantha Carter, had disappeared. The remaining members of the time were pleasant, polite and absolutely no help at all. The captain wondered vaguely what being court-martialled was actually like, while not so far away, Sam Carter walked down a corridor, trying to follow instincts she wasn't sure she had.  
  
But Sam had her hopes. All she knew how to do was to wander aimlessly around, keeping her fingers crossed. And sketchy a plan as it was, it worked. As Sam turned a corner, she felt something deep within her mind… a flash of recognition.  
  
Jack felt something in his pocked buzz. He waited for the captain to walk ahead of him, and falling behind, he pulled the walkie-talkie out of his pocket. "Carter?"  
  
"Sir! I think I can sense him. He's very near here."  
  
"Good! Stay where you are, I'll try and find you," Jack replied. Grabbing Teal'C, he slipped away down a corridor, and the team leader and the Jaffa tried to look inconspicuous as they followed the instructions Sam gave them.  
  
"Well?" Jack demanded, as Sam came into sight. "Any ideas?"  
  
"I can sense the presence of a Tok'ra nearby," she responded, "but nothing more specific than that, I'm afraid."  
  
"All right, we'll split up," Jack said, secretly hoping the captain they'd thrown off their trail was a little slow on the uptake. "Teal'C, you go that way, Carter, behind us, and I'll go straight ahead."  
  
Sam glanced at her CO for a second, and did as she was told. No matter how afraid she was for Daniel, now was not the time for sentiment. All that would come later.  
  
Jack strode off down the corridor, trying to look as if he knew exactly where he was going, while in actual fact he was glancing in the door of every room he passed, searching.  
  
He searched as thoroughly as was humanly possible, when he reached a dead end. Muttering angrily to himself, he made to turn around, then paused. There was another door here, hidden in a corner so he hadn't seen it. It led to a darkened room. Tentatively, Jack pushed it open and entered. He could hardly see anything in the darkness, so he nearly tripped over the body lying on the floor.  
  
"Crap!" Jack leant down and found the young doctor lying there was not dead, merely profoundly unconscious. Jack made a grab at his dog tags. In the dim light he could only make out one word: 'Mackintosh.'  
  
Suddenly, Jack heard a movement. Rather, he sensed it. He wondered briefly whether this was what it was like for Carter, inexplicably sensing things, but he let go of the thought in a second. Instead of thinking, he took a few large strides forwards… and saw Daniel.  
  
"Shit, Daniel…" Daniel's long hair and blue eyes made him look younger than he really was, and Jack couldn't stand it. He stood still for perhaps five minutes, gazing at the broken remains of his archaeologist and Zelnar's child host. Then he leaned forwards, gathered Daniel up in his arms and held him close.  
  
Sam entered the room five minutes later to see Jack holding Daniel in his arms, and wisely said nothing. A short while later, they left with Teal'C in tow, Jack still carrying Daniel like he would carry a child. They left the room in darkness, with an unconscious doctor and a syringe full of blood on the floor.  
  
6.2 Later  
  
Dimly, Daniel could feel that something had changed. SG-1 had come for him, like they had done many times before. But it was only a dim impression; he knew he had been taken back to Cheyenne Mountain, but he was beyond caring now. He wanted most of all to be left in peace to die, or better yet, simply remain as he was, slipping in and out of consciousness. Whenever he slept, he dreamed, soft, captivating dreams, dreams he preferred to troubled wakefulness. Even when he was awake, he knew Zelnar was in control of his body, and he heard her whispering to him. Zelnar knew he was to far gone to be listening to her voice, slipping slowly and gently away from her, away from her love for him… slipping away…  
  
Janet was almost in despair. Daniel had been restrained for weeks, and enough blood had been taken from him to kill him, very slowly. But by dint of much care and gentleness, transfusions and guesswork, she was slowly bringing Daniel back to life. She knew how to combat the concrete things, such as the blood loss, but she couldn't see into Daniel's mind. She saw his eyes glow, day after day, and knew the host was almost never in control of his own body any more. Zelnar was keeping her host alive, but she could do little else. Daniel had withdrawn fully, refusing to wake and think and face the world any more. Janet spent a lot of time doing things no other doctor on Earth had to do, but even she was bewildered by this. Like SG-1, she had been shocked and horrified by what she saw when SG-1 brought Daniel home. Janet was moved to wonder what exactly had happened to him beyond the blood-letting. She suspected she might never find out.  
  
Jack entered the infirmary some time later. Between them, he and Hammond had spent a good deal of time fabricating a good explanation as to why SG-1 and an Area 51 test subject had inexplicably disappeared, and why a doctor slash scientist named Mack had suddenly become prey to paranoid delusions involving glowing-eyed aliens and syringes full of blood. But Jack was finished with all of that now, and he only had eyes for Daniel.  
  
The young archaeologist's eyes were open, but blank. Zelnar had relinquished control, but Daniel simply wasn't there; he had retreated within his mind. The intelligence that should have shone through his blue eyes had faded; so had any semblance of life.  
  
The sight seemed to stir something in the tough Air Force colonel. "Danny," he whispered urgently, "talk to me. Please…"  
  
Daniel could hear the voice. Part of him wanted very much to respond, to reassure Jack, but another part of him was content just to drift…  
  
"Danny! Daniel!" Jack said sharply. "Daniel, I know you're there. Please… just talk to me, okay? It's all right here, you're safe here, talk to me, please…"  
  
Talk to him, Daniel!  
  
Another voice, inside his head this time. Daniel didn't know if it was worth the effort, whether there was anything in his life worth returning for. He had a place in his mind where he was always safe now, where they couldn't get to him no matter what they did, no matter what terrible and horrific things they did to him, they couldn't get to him…  
  
"Daniel!" Jack was trying not to raise his voice any further, but it was very difficult. He looked closer at the archaeologist where he lay. Did he just see his friend's eyelids flutter? Was he getting closer?  
  
Daniel!  
  
"Daniel!"  
  
Jack watched with bated breath as Daniel's eyes blazed white-gold, and then faded once again, quickly back into blue. Zelnar had come and gone, but she had left something in her wake. Jack knew his friend had returned: Daniel's eyes were alive again, shining with human intelligence… and something else.  
  
"Daniel?"  
  
Jack held Daniel as he had done before, and let him cry softly. He held him for as long as it took for Daniel to cry himself into exhaustion. After a pause, Jack laid the Tok'ra host down gently. He was human again. Jack saw Daniel glance all around the room, taking in every detail of the reality he had returned to, and then his eyes closed and he slept, tears still gleaming on his lashes.  
  
Somewhere within, Zelnar slept soundly alongside her host. Daniel/Zelnar was at peace. So was Jack O'Neill.  
  
6.3 A fortnight later  
  
'This.' This… the next word was illegible, but carrying on, 'the place…' something, he wasn't sure what. Anyway, 'legacy, contained here…'  
  
Daniel paused. The translation hadn't been going well, but 'place' and 'legacy' so close to each other might mean a connection with the Ancients and the 'place of our legacy' so he made a mental note before continuing.  
  
Daniel?  
  
At first sight, the next word seemed to be 'aubergine' but Daniel had his doubts. Tapping the inscription with one hand, he saw a large flake of rust fall off it, revealing the other half of the word. All right, he understood that now. 'legacy, contained here for all time.' That did sound a lot like the Ancients, but they spoke and wrote a variant of Latin, and this wasn't anything like Latin, bearing more relation to Sanskrit than anything else.  
  
Daniel?  
  
The archaeologist decided to give it a rest then; he'd done as much as could without a break. He stood up slowly, and made his way out of the door. He didn't feel like finding Jack, who would probably be knee-deep in paperwork by now and cranky with it. However, Sam, a fellow scientist, was usually glad of his interruptions. The duo often found they had a good effect on each other; when one was stuck, the other could see the light, and vice versa.  
  
Daniel?  
  
Sam would probably be somewhere in the vicinity of the Gate room. Like Daniel himself, she couldn't stay away from the Stargate, the focus of everything they did, and accordingly, that was where Daniel went. His own messy, book-lined study was a few levels above the Gate room, so it took him several minutes to get there. He didn't mind that, not being in any kind of a hurry.  
  
Daniel! Talk to me, child!  
  
Daniel stopped for a brief instant, and then carried on walking. Sam had said something about taking a look at the MALPs; the Stargate teams destroyed them and lost them so much that new ones were needed all the time.  
  
Daniel, you cannot ignore me forever.  
  
Finally, Daniel responded to the nagging voice inside his head. Just watch me, he thought bitterly, shaking off any feelings of guilt, and carried on.  
  
Daniel, please! I do not understand you; why do you resent me now?  
  
Anyone who was passing at that moment saw the SG-1 archaeologist abruptly stop, his blue eyes taking on a blank, vacant expression as his attention turned inward. He felt tired suddenly; he was still slightly anaemic thanks to the huge amount of blood he had lost, and Janet was still keeping her eye on him. Without saying a word, either out loud or inside his head, Daniel returned to his own study, shut the door, sat in a chair and waited.  
  
Tell me what troubles you, child.  
  
You do, Zelnar.  
  
I said so before: I do not understand. Why will you not talk to me?  
  
Because of what you've made me.  
  
What have I made you, child?  
  
You've turned me into a host for a Goa'uld. That's all I'll ever be.  
  
I am not a Goa'uld!  
  
That's what you say, Zelnar! But what have you done? You've invaded me through the back of my neck. You've given me an entry scar. You've given me eyes that glow gold and you've given me the power to kill with my mind. And back in that place… you would have made a murderer out of me.  
  
No!  
  
Tell me, Zelnar… tell me, if Jack hadn't come for me then, you wouldn't have found Maybourne and killed him in cold blood.  
  
I would have killed him. I would not have killed him in cold blood.  
  
What do you mean by that?  
  
What did that human do to you, Daniel? You have not forgotten, and I have not forgiven. I loved you, Daniel, and I still love you, my host. My desire for revenge was born out of that and that alone.  
  
Revenge… you wanted revenge.  
  
Yes, I wanted revenge. It was not right, just as my invasion of your body was not right. I apologise here and now, but you should not have to accept my apologies.  
  
What are you saying?  
  
I am not a Goa'uld, Daniel, but I am not a Tok'ra. I have been told many times that my passions run too high, and that I am too blind with anger and desire for vengeance. When I invaded you, I was sentenced by Selmak and the Tok'ra High Council. They made the right decision, child… you should have gone to Cimmeria and let Thor's Hammer take me.  
  
I didn't want you to die!  
  
You did not. Perhaps now you think differently. Daniel, you always have a choice… you did not blend with me by choice, so your choice is to stay with me within you, or alternatively, journey to Cimmeria… I will not stop you. Let the Asgard take me and kill me.  
  
Zelnar, you're saying… I should let you die?  
  
Yes, child.  
  
No! I… I didn't ask to be blended with you. But if I could go back in time…  
  
Yes?  
  
I wouldn't have it any different.  
  
You are too young, too wise, too forgiving, child. Why do you think this?  
  
Zelnar, when you were going to kill Maybourne, did you know they would have taken you from me, and dissected you, and killed you?  
  
They would not have killed you!  
  
Possibly. But they would have killed you for certain. Did you know that?  
  
Yes, I did.  
  
Then you deserve to live. You would have died for me.  
  
You are a child, Daniel, my host, and I love you. I would have died for you because of it.  
  
I love you too, Zelnar.  
  
Daniel didn't say anything more. He didn't think there was nothing more to be said. Instead, he got to his feet, went down several levels to where Sam Carter was sitting on a MALP, and returned to his own life.  
  
She smiled to see him, and didn't seem surprised when he didn't say anything. She gave him the coffee she knew he wanted, and returned to her task of figuring out why wormhole travel had such an adverse effect on the MALP thermal imaging cameras. Daniel pulled a notepad from his pocket and began jotting down notes. 'Place of our legacy' didn't seem right, but perhaps if he altered the syntax a little…  
  
The two scientists worked in relative peace and quiet for around half an hour, but that was when the companionable silence was rudely shattered by one Colonel Jack O'Neill.  
  
"Where the hell have you been, kids?"  
  
"If you mean us, Jack, we're here," said Daniel mildly, not lifting his eyes from his book. Zelnar was seized by a sudden impulse, and after quickly communicating it to her amused host, she proceeded to give Jack a shock.  
  
The team leader jumped back in alarm as Daniel's eyes blazed white gold. "I am not a 'kid,' Colonel O'Neill," Zelnar informed him. "I am in actual fact several centuries older in age than yourself. Kindly address me as such."  
  
"Yes, ma'am!" Jack exclaimed.  
  
After the Tok'ra's voice and eyes had faded, Sam and Daniel tried in vain to stifle their giggles. Jack thought about glaring at them, and then decided to treat the whole incident as if it hadn't happened.  
  
"As I was saying," Jack continued, "we're due to ship out in a couple of hours, and I do believe you've both completely forgotten about it."  
  
"You're coming with us, Daniel?" Sam asked.  
  
"Yeah, I am. It's a peaceful mission, right?"  
  
"Yeah," Jack said. "Reconnaissance only."  
  
"Good," said Daniel vaguely, as Zelnar was laughing inside his head. "Then I'm coming."  
  
Some time later, SG-1 stood at the base of the Gate ramp, watching the Stargate rotate as the technicians dialled the address. Suddenly, Jack noticed something unusual.  
  
"Daniel?"  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"Where's your gun?"  
  
Daniel smiled. "I don't need it, Jack," he said softly, lifting his right hand so the team leader could see. It was covered with the shining metal links of a Goa'uld ribbon weapon.  
  
Jack gaped. "Can you…"  
  
"Yes, I can," Daniel replied confidently, his eyes gleaming. He couldn't feel the metal on his hand; it was if it had blended with his hand and become part of him. Zelnar had changed him… for the better.  
  
The seventh chevron locked and the Stargate opened. The plasma wash settled into the familiar shimmering surface of the wormhole.  
  
Jack glanced at his archaeologist as they headed through the Gate. He remembered an old saying he used to tell Charlie sometimes. What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger…  
  
Jack saw the shining metal on his friend's hands, and the strength in Daniel's eyes, and knew the truth.  
  
Blending, invasion, torture, hatred, revenge, murder and love… Daniel and Zelnar were stronger now. 


End file.
